Sew Jokes

Why can't redditors sew?

Because the thread has been locked by a moderator

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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Coffee Mug

How many cats does it take to make a fur coat?

None! Cats can't sew!

What did Picard say to Riker when the knitting machine wouldn't print single digits?

Make it sew number 1!

How's your homophone needlepoint project coming along?

Sew sew

Why would a needle even be in a haystack?

Who sews in a barn

What did the tailor do after she got hit by the lawyer's car?

Sewed him

What did Jean-Luc Picard say in frustration to the incompetent Singer repairman?

Make it *sew*!

What did they sew you up with?

My Dad laughing so hard - as he said "That's not funny!" Cat Gut

What did the tailor say about her job?

It's sew sew

Who sews really really fast?

Tailor Swift

What is the difference between a dressmaker and a farmer?

A dressmaker sews what she gathers a farmer gathers what he sows.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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What did Captain Picard say when he saw the new sewing machine?

Make it sew!

What if I sewed myself shut?

Doc: Suture self.

Why can't you find good quality clothing on the Iron Islands?

They do not sew

What do you call someone who sews extremely fast?

Taylor Swift...

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Thread Jokes More Thread Jokes

What is a joke that so stupid that is actually funny?

There was a thread months ago but i lost it...

What do you award to someone who comments in a thread from a month ago?

Reddit Old

Taylor Swift Jokes More Taylor Swift Jokes

What are you doing?

Are you writing down everything I'm saying ! IS THIS GONNA BE A SONG ! !" -anyone dating Taylor Swift

Why dont you like Taylor Swift?

Shes awesome!". Because I knew she was trouble when she walked in.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

Whats the difference between a bag of cocaine and a 4 year old?

Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window

What's the difference between Ray Charles and Ray Rice?

Ray Charles wasn't a one-hit wonder.

Picard Jokes More Picard Jokes

What did Picard say to Riker when the knitting machine wouldn't print single digits?

Make it sew number 1!

What did Picard say when Riker asked him what kind of Chinese food he wanted?

Make it Tso's Number One."

Jean Luc Picard Jokes More Jean Luc Picard Jokes

How Many Lightbulbs Does it Take to Change Captain Jean Luc Picard?

4 or 5.

What did Jean-Luc Picard say in frustration to the incompetent Singer repairman?

Make it *sew*!

Cat Jokes More Cat Jokes

Where should you take your cat, if it somehow loses its tail?

Walmart, they're the world's biggest retailer. Thank you. I'll be here all week.

What do you call a cat that's guilty of infidelity?

A cheetah

Moderator Jokes More Moderator Jokes

Why can't redditors sew?

Because the thread has been locked by a moderator

How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Who gives a cluck (I wonder if the moderators will censor this joke merely on the grounds that it is categorically terrible )

Riker Jokes More Riker Jokes

What did Picard say to Riker when the knitting machine wouldn't print single digits?

Make it sew number 1!

What's the difference between Rutgers and Rikers?

One turns young people into horrible human beings and the other is jail.