Steve Jobs Jokes

What my iPhone and Steve Jobs have in common?

They are both dead...

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Why did Steve Jobs die too soon?

Because an apple a day keeps the doctor away.

What did Bill Gates say to Steve Jobs?

Your products are fruity.

Why did Steve Jobs decline chemotherapy?

Because an apple a day keeps the doctor away.

What's the Difference Between Steve Jobs and Bill Gates?

Bill Gates never got a Mac, but Steve Jobs got PC.

Why are Apple products popular with hipsters?

Steve Jobs went underground.

How did Steve Jobs die?

From PC

What do you get when Steve Jobs hires and fires a lot of people in six months?

A: An Apple turnover.

Why is Steve Jobs middle child unemployed?

Because he's always inbetween jobs.

Where did Steve Jobs and Bill Gates go to get a drink?

The Space Bar

What would Apple laptops be called if Steve Jobs had been Irish?

McBook Eyre

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How bad is the economy?

Twenty years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Today we have no cash, no hope and no jobs.

What's the final product Steve Jobs released?

The iDied

Why did Steve Jobs lose on the X Factor?

because Sam sung better than him

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What do they call the doctor who released private health information after he got mad at his being given away?

A Hipaacrite

Why did they release Star Wars 4, 5 & 6 before 1, 2 & 3?

Because off sequence, Yoda was.

Hope Jokes More Hope Jokes

What's the difference between a woman in a bathtub and a woman in a church?

The woman in church has hope in her soul.

What's the difference between a woman in church and a woman in the bath?

One has hope in her soul...

Doctor Jokes More Doctor Jokes

How bad are they?

Doctor: It depends, how old are you Patient: I will be 24 soon. Doctor: Pffff, no you won't.

Why was John Lennon shocked when he got his wife's gynecologist bill?

He had misunderstood the doctor when he said "I do probe Ono."

Steve Job Jokes More Steve Job Jokes

What is the similarity between Steve Job and Robb Stark?

They both died when they were really popular.

What is Steve Job's favorite food?

Nothing because he's dead*

Year Ago Jokes More Year Ago Jokes

How bad is the economy?

Twenty years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Today we have no cash, no hope and no jobs.

Why frogs don't use Google?

They're angry since Froogle was discontinued years ago!

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

Why does Garfield hate Mondays?

He doesn't have a job.

How bad is the economy?

Twenty years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Today we have no cash, no hope and no jobs.

Apple Product Jokes More Apple Product Jokes

Why are Apple products popular with hipsters?

Steve Jobs went underground.

How can you tell if someone uses Apple products?

Just wait and they'll tell you.

Cash Jokes More Cash Jokes

How many cafeteria staff does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry we closed 18 seconds ago and I've just cashed up."

Whole Foods "All the cash in a bag NOW!" 100% organic reusable bag ok?

Yes!" puts half the cash I had to charge for the bag