Terminator Jokes

Why didn't the terminator upgrade to windows 10?

I asked him and he said, "I still love vista, baby!"

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How do you catch a terminator?

With a skynet

What's the Terminator's favourite band?

Guns 'n Roses

What do you call a Robotic Abortion Doctor?

The Terminator

This joke may have profanity.

What did the Terminator say when he was invited to a music themed fancy dress party?

I'll be Bach.

What does a black men and the Terminator have in common?

One says "Hasta la vista baby!!" and the other one says "Hasta la vista son"

What do Glenn Rhee, Jon Snow, and the Terminator have in common?

They'll be back.

What do you get when you cross Hilter, the Terminator, and Cthulhu?

Don't stick around to find out!

How does the Terminator lose weight?

By counting Kylereese.

Where does Walmart keep the Terminator toys?

Aisle B, back.

Why did Arnold show up at the rodent infested house?

Because he is an ex-Terminator.

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What did the Terminator say when he decided to take up piano?

I'll be bach.

What did Arnold Schwarzenegger do after he retired?

He became an ex-terminator!

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What did the poles do during world war two?

They held the telephone wires off the ground.

What do your mother and the ground have in common?

They are always full of seed.

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What did Mr T say when asked if he had any wool?

Yes sir, yes sir, three bags, fool.

What are homeless ducks always asking for?

A lil bit of quack

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How did a blind woman drive herself crazy?

A. Trying to read a stucco wall.

What do you call Kim Jong-un reading a Stephen King novel?

Fearless Reader

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What is Little Finger's favorite thing about poetry?

Shtanzas"

What kind of dinosaur writes poetry?

A Bronte-saurus.

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What is the difference between Game of Thrones and Twitter?

With Twitter you only get 140 characters.

What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a four-year old child?

Eric Clapton never would have let his bag of coke fall out of a 49th-story window!

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How do Spaniards take their coffee?

Au lait.

Why do Communists only drink coffee?

Because proper tea is theft.

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What does Ukraine have in common with the iPhone 7?

They both suffered the loss of one very important port.

What is it that you are both most fearful of?

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What did the Mexican... What did the Mexican man order at the country musician themed restaurant?

A Reba!

What do you call a techno-themed grocery store?

Gigi D'Agostino