Terminator Jokes

Why didn't the terminator upgrade to windows 10?

I asked him and he said, "I still love vista, baby!"

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How do you catch a terminator?

With a skynet

What's the Terminator's favourite band?

Guns 'n Roses

What do you call a Robotic Abortion Doctor?

The Terminator

This joke may have profanity.

What did the Terminator say when he was invited to a music themed fancy dress party?

I'll be Bach.

What does a black men and the Terminator have in common?

One says "Hasta la vista baby!!" and the other one says "Hasta la vista son"

What do Glenn Rhee, Jon Snow, and the Terminator have in common?

They'll be back.

What do you get when you cross Hilter, the Terminator, and Cthulhu?

Don't stick around to find out!

How does the Terminator lose weight?

By counting Kylereese.

Where does Walmart keep the Terminator toys?

Aisle B, back.

Why did Arnold show up at the rodent infested house?

Because he is an ex-Terminator.

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What did the Terminator say when he decided to take up piano?

I'll be bach.

What did Arnold Schwarzenegger do after he retired?

He became an ex-terminator!

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Bag Jokes More Bag Jokes

What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a small child?

Eric Clapton would never let a small bag of cocaine fall out of a window.

What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a 4-year old child?

Eric Clapton never would have let his bag of coke fall out a 53rd-story window!

Position Jokes More Position Jokes

What position makes the ugliest children?

Ask your parents

What happens when U change position too fast?

You get an unpleasant vowel movement.

Muslim Jokes More Muslim Jokes

How do Muslims laugh?

Muahahahamed Note: I don't have any prejudices against Islamic people.

What did the muslim woman say to her new fiance?

Jihad me at hello.

Termination Jokes More Termination Jokes

What do you call a pink slip served in a coffee bag?

Grounds for termination!

What do you call a pink slip served inside a bag of coffee?

Grounds for termination.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between the ISIS headquarters and a kindergarten?

I don't know, I just fly the drone.

How do you tell the difference between a redditor and a MOBA player?

Ask them what OP stands for.

Vista Jokes More Vista Jokes

What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when someone told him to upgrade to Windows 7?

I still love vista, baby

How does Microsoft count to 10?

1, 2, 3, 95, 98, ME, NT, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10.

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

What kind of eel is this?

Diner at the sushi restaurant: "What kind of eel is this?" Waiter: "Do you love it?" Diner: "yeah" Waiter: "Then, that's a moray"

What is the difference between love and lust?

Spiiting and swallowing.

Performer Jokes More Performer Jokes

What happened to the performer who read poetry to terminally ill patients?

He suffered an elegiac reaction.

What did the circus owner say to the human-cannonball when the he wanted to retire?

How will I ever find another performer of your caliber? (Source: a dad on thanksgiving)