Urine Jokes

What did the PEE CLUB SOCIETY said to me on the taster session?

URINE!

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What did the Sewage Worker say to his apprentice?

Urine for a surprise.

What did the urologist say to his physician before he hired him?

URINE. I'll let myself out.

What did the swollen prostate say during the prostatectomy?

I'm out, urine.

What did the toilet say to the pee?

urine

What is 40ft long and smells like urine?

Line dancing at sun city

What did the failing kidney say to the healthy one?

Urine charge now.

What do you say if your peeing in Ireland and spot a leprechaun?

Urine luck

What did the Urologist tell his newly accepted resident?

Urine.

What did R. Kelly say to the teenage girl fan?

Urine for a surprise.

Why do American beer companies always advise that their beer should be served cold?

So you can tell it apart from urine

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What do you say to the guy who just jumped in the septic tank?

Urine over your head!

What would be the movie called if it were about you?

You Yourself &amp Urine.

What's bad about wetting your bed?

Urine it.

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Why does John Snow wear a Rolex ?

Because he's a man of the nice watch

What's the last thing you want to hear while using a urinal?

nice watch"

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Why can't you tell when a Pteradactyl goes to the toilet?

Because the P is silent.

How do u make a Pirate angry?

Take the P out of him.

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Why do urologists like UTIs?

It means urine business.

Why is a UTI such a bad thing?

Because it means urine trouble

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Which Russian leader is always farting?

Putin

What did Putin say to the U.S. and E.U. after invading Ukraine?

Crimea river

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Why did Taco Bell hire Eminem?

Because he's a Wrap God

Why should we hire the chickpeas to be part of our choir?

They could hummus a song! (I was really proud of this one.)

Police Officer Jokes More Police Officer Jokes

When is it ok to snipe police officers?

As Dallast resort.

How do you describe a hierarchy of police officers with only one word?

Police police police police police police police police police police police.

Medication Jokes More Medication Jokes

What did the urologist say to his patient who forgot to take his medication?

Urine trouble!

What medications do I take?

I'm not sure. The names on my neighbor's prescription bottles are ridiculously long

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Whats the worst thing about manufacturing tabletops?

It's counterproductive

Why do bad things happen to good people?

To even out the good things that happen to bad people.