Waitress Jokes

What did the waitress say to the customer after she forgot his Miso soup?

A: uh, me so sorry.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

When can you tell your waitress is having a bad day?

When she has a tampon behind her ear and she can't find her pencil.

Where do one-legged waitresses work?

IHOP. Tipping your waitress takes on a whole new meaning.

What's the difference between a waitress and your mom?

A waitress leaves me alone after I give her the tip.

Why was the United Nations concerned when the waitress dropped the platter on Thanksgiving?

It meant the fall of Turkey, the ruin of Greece, and the breakup of China.

Why do waitresses hate mohels?

Because they never leave a tip.

What's the worst part of giving a magician a ride home?

When you get there, you turn into the driveway. Ba-dum-bum! Don't forget to tip your waitress!

What do you get when you drop a piano in a coal mine?

A flat minor. Night... Don't forget to tip your waitress

When a waitress asks me if I want soup or salad, I always ask "who's in charge of tossing the salads here?

Then I frown & order the soup.

How do you know your waitress is having a rough night?

She's got a tampon behind her ear and she can't find her pen.

What did the redditor do at the restaurant when he was done with his meal?

Tips waitress*

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

Why do waitresses love serving men in fedoras?

If you're nice to them, their tipping intensifies.

How much is a soft drink ?

Waitress: Fifty cents. Girl: How much is refill Waitress: The first is free. Girl: Well then I'll have a refill.

How would you like that cooked?

gets right up in waitresses face* With frickin fire, obviously

What's the difference between a waiter and a waitress?

The size of the tip.

What did Johnny Cash say to the waitress after he got sick at a Mexican restaurant?

I've bean everywhere, ma'am!

You might also enjoy:

Customer Jokes More Customer Jokes

Why was that guy yelling at you?

flashback to me ignoring the "one per customer" sign me with a mouthful of cheese samples No idea

What did the customer say to the overworked seamstress?

Wow, you seamstressed out. (I'm so sorry)

Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

What should you buy if your hair falls out ?

A good vacuum cleaner !

Why did the polynomial tree fall over?

It didn't have any real roots

Cent Jokes More Cent Jokes

Why did the nickel jump off the building but the dime didn't?

The dime had more cents.

Which president was the most logical?

Lincoln. He made the most cents.

Driveway Jokes More Driveway Jokes

Why couldn't the whistleblower leave his driveway?

Because he was snowed in.

What's the worst part of giving a magician a ride home?

When you get there, you turn into the driveway. Ba-dum-bum! Don't forget to tip your waitress!

United Nations Jokes More United Nations Jokes

Why was the United Nations concerned when the waitress dropped the platter on Thanksgiving?

It meant the fall of Turkey, the ruin of Greece, and the breakup of China.

What's the difference a teckel and the United Nations?

There's none. They both have big hearts but a short reach.

Liberian Jokes More Liberian Jokes

What did the New Yorker order from the Liberian waitress?

Ebola soup!

Where are you from?

So where are you from?" "I'm a Liberian" "Oh sorry" *whispers*

Magician Jokes More Magician Jokes

What did the spectator say when the magician transformed Dracula into 2?

Miraculous. Edited: tough crowd

How do magicians retire?

They seem to just disappear.

New Yorker Jokes More New Yorker Jokes

What's the difference between a New Yorker and a Canadian?

A New Yorker takes the A train; a Canadian takes the train, eh.

Why did the New Yorker sleep under an oil tank?

He wanted to wake up oily.