British People Jokes

How do Jamaicans pronounce bacon?

The same way British people pronounce beer can.

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What do British people call concrete?

Arsephalt

Why can't British people go to North Korea?

Nobody at the ticket counter knows what "north career" means

What's the difference between watts and ohms?

Watts are a unit of electrical energy. Ohms are where British people live.

Why don't British people pronounce their T's?

Because they're all in the Boston harbor."

What organ do only British people have?

The Eng gland.

What if weight loss supplements ads are just made by British people really transparently trying to scam you?

You'll lost 30 for only $42.82! Guaranteed.

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30 Jokes More 30 Jokes

Who can shave 30 times a day and still have a beard?

A barber.

How do you get 30 drunk Canadians out of the pool?

Please Get Out The Pool"

Bum Jokes More Bum Jokes

How do you get stuck in an annoying conversation with a stranger?

Ask someone vaping if you can bum a cigarette.

What did the man who invented the bum shaking machine realize when he turned it on?

It twerked.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between the substance inside a fire hydrant and the substance on the outside of it?

H20 is on the inside, and K9P is on the outside.

What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottish Highlander?

Mick Jagger sings, "Hey you, get off of my cloud . . ", while the Scottish Highlander yells, "Hey McCloud, get off of my ewe!"

Guarantee Jokes More Guarantee Jokes

Who's the best person to invite over for Christmas?

Charlie Sheen. Because you know it's GUARANTEED to be a white Christmas when he's around.

What does MSG stand for?

Mandarin Service Guaranteed.

Organ Jokes More Organ Jokes

Why are organ donations low ?

Because most people have pianos

What looks better... than roses your piano?

Tulips on your organ.

Ohm Jokes More Ohm Jokes

What does the electron say to the resistor?

Ohm my god you're impeding me. *initiate knee slap

What's the difference between watts and ohms?

Watts are a unit of electrical energy. Ohms are where British people live.

Boston Jokes More Boston Jokes

What did the fisherman from Boston say to the magician?

Pick a cod, any cod!

What do you call a beautiful girl in Boston?

A tourist.

Mean Jokes More Mean Jokes

When someone ask me... How are you?

I answer back... You mean in bed

What do you do, if you're jerking off when you're meant to do something else but you're putting it off?

Procrasturbation.