Czech Jokes

Why can it be so annoying to drive a Skoda?

The Czech engine light is always on.

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What do you call someone from Olomouc who's living on the dole?

A welfare Czech.

What's an eastern European cannibal's favorite snack?

Czechs Mix

What do you call an abortion in Prague?

A cancelled Czech.

This joke may have profanity.

What happens when your friend from Prague topples over?

You right a Czech.

Why are the best accountants twins from Prague?

Because they always double Czech their work!

What do you call a country that doesn't use credit cards?

A Czech Republic

What do you call it when you get stuck into a shotgun wedding with a Czech?

Checkmate!

Why do slovaks don't like Czechs?

They prefer cash.

Who's there ! Czech ! Czech who ?

Czech before you open the door !

Where did Czechslovakia split up?

At the Czech-out line.

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What do you call a Slavic spouse?

Czech-mate

Why did Bobby Fischer marry a woman from Prague?

A: He was looking for a Czech mate.

What happened when the bankrupt eastern european jumped off a building?

The Czech bounced.

How did the terrorist get into Czechoslovakia?

They didn't czech his papers.

Why was the chessmaster interested in foreign women?

A: He wanted a Czech mate.

Who is the chess player's dream companion?

A *Czech Mate*

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Friend Jokes More Friend Jokes

When one points and asks his friend, "Is that statue a foot?

To which his friend replies, "No, it's about four and a half feet."

What do black people with Down's Syndrome call their friends?

Their Chromies

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

Why did Helen Keller stop cleaning her dishes?

She was running out of things to read.

How do you drive this thing?

Two soldiers are in a tank. One turns to the other and says "GLUGGLUGBLUGBWOOABB"

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happens when Frogs die playing Call of Duty?

They respawn.

What happened when the black man went to night school?

The teacher marked him absent.

Cancel Czech Jokes More Cancel Czech Jokes

What do they call aborted fetuses in Prague?

Cancelled Czechs.

What do people in Prague call abortions?

Canceled Czechs

Abortion Jokes More Abortion Jokes

How do they perform abortions at Hogwarts?

Fetus Deletus

Why are there no nice cars in heaven?

Because abortions float.

Traffic Jokes More Traffic Jokes

What's the best thing about North Korea?

The traffic.

What do you call an Oyster who is stuck in traffic?

A: A PearlJam

Cancel Jokes More Cancel Jokes

What club cancels their meeting everytime?

The vegan club

Why can't random men check random women's breasts for cancel?

Because that sort of information is on a knead to know basis.

Aborted Fetus Jokes More Aborted Fetus Jokes

Why did the woman take her third aborted fetus to see the priest on Sunday?

Half Life 3 Confirmed!

What do they call aborted fetuses in Prague?

Cancelled Czechs.