Czech Jokes

Why can it be so annoying to drive a Skoda?

The Czech engine light is always on.

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What do you call someone from Olomouc who's living on the dole?

A welfare Czech.

What's an eastern European cannibal's favorite snack?

Czechs Mix

What do you call an abortion in Prague?

A cancelled Czech.

This joke may have profanity.

What happens when your friend from Prague topples over?

You right a Czech.

Why are the best accountants twins from Prague?

Because they always double Czech their work!

What do you call a country that doesn't use credit cards?

A Czech Republic

What do you call it when you get stuck into a shotgun wedding with a Czech?

Checkmate!

Why do slovaks don't like Czechs?

They prefer cash.

Who's there ! Czech ! Czech who ?

Czech before you open the door !

Where did Czechslovakia split up?

At the Czech-out line.

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What do you call a Slavic spouse?

Czech-mate

Why did Bobby Fischer marry a woman from Prague?

A: He was looking for a Czech mate.

What happened when the bankrupt eastern european jumped off a building?

The Czech bounced.

How did the terrorist get into Czechoslovakia?

They didn't czech his papers.

Why was the chessmaster interested in foreign women?

A: He wanted a Czech mate.

Who is the chess player's dream companion?

A *Czech Mate*

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Work Jokes More Work Jokes

How can you tell if the code is broken?

SW Engineering joke) If India worked on it

What does a gangbanger have in common with a soda machine?

They both don't work and always take your money

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

What game do 18 dogs like to play during the summer?

Woofleball

What do you call a person who likes white rice, and not brown rice?

A ricest.

Checkmate Jokes More Checkmate Jokes

What do you call it when you get stuck into a shotgun wedding with a Czech?

Checkmate!

What is Checkmate?

You tell your Wife, "I saw a lady, looked exactly like you" Wife asks, "WAS SHE BEAUTIFUL?" You cant say 'NO' You cant say 'YES' That is Checkmate!

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What's the last thing you want to hear when blowing Willie Nelson?

I'm not Willie Nelson"

What do you call the things on the end of Winnie the Pooh's feet?

Putos (Ask your Mexican friend)

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happens to someone who gets attacked by bees?

They get bee'd up

What would happen if Leafy went to The Filthy Frank show?

Chin-chin would leave.

Double Jokes More Double Jokes

What would I be if I doubled myself?

Meme

How do you double the price of a Fiat?

Fill the tank

Credit Card Jokes More Credit Card Jokes

What's 3 inches long and pleases all women?

A credit card.

How will Santa get in?

Me: Probably through my credit card. 5: what Me: what

Cancel Jokes More Cancel Jokes

What do you call an aborted Czechoslovakian?

A cancelled Chzeck.

Why did the watermelon and the honeydew decide to cancel their spontaneous wedding in Las Vegas?

They realized with a family like theirs, they really Cantaloupe.