Golf Course Jokes

How do you cover 18 holes with one hole?

Have your mom sit down on a golf course.

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What do you call a Russian on a golf course?

Vladimir Puttin'

Why did the elephant take off his socks at the golf course?

He got a hole in one.

Why don't golf courses ever serve sandwiches?

They always turn out to be sub par.

Why did Tiger Woods stop designing golf courses?

He couldn't keep it down to 18 holes.

What do you call a dog with a stain on his fur?

Spot. What do you call a dog who lays on a golf course Ruff. What do you call a dog who just got run over Rhody.

Why aren't you allowed alcohol on a golf course?

Because it's a crime to drink and drive.

How are 6 women like a golf course?

NSFW 18 holes

This joke may have profanity.

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What's the difference between a blonde and McDonald's?

A: A blonde serves more people in a night.

Why don't golf courses ever serve sandwiches?

They always turn out to be sub par.

Mexican Jokes More Mexican Jokes

Why don't mexicans have checking accounts?

It's too hard to spray paint your name on the little line.

What happened to the Mexican after he took heroin for the third time?

He over 'd

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Whatya doin?

Me: I fixed the toilet so I'm adding Potty Fixer to my resume W: You mean Plumber M: DO I LOOK LIKE A HOUSE SCIENTIST

What does that cloud look like to you?

3-year-old: A cloud. Me: No, what do you imagine it could be 3-year-old: Rain.

Run Jokes More Run Jokes

What do you call a midget psychic running from the cops?

A small medium at large!

What did the Pelican say to the fish when he was running late for work?

I'll catch you later!

18 Hole Jokes More 18 Hole Jokes

Why did Tiger Woods stop designing golf courses?

He couldn't keep it down to 18 holes.

How do you cover 18 holes with one hole?

Have your mom sit down on a golf course.

Sandwich Jokes More Sandwich Jokes

What did one redneck say to the other?

If you were anymore inbred, you'd be a sandwich.

Where do weightlifters get their sandwiches?

Subwhey.

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

Why didn't the table want to be sat on?

He wasn't a charitable guy

What time is it when an elephant sits on your car?

Time to get a new car.

Design Jokes More Design Jokes

What do you call a social media platform designed for religious people who also have speech impediments?

Faithbook

Why is there lipstick on your collar?

she yelled. "It's part of the design," I said, opening up my wardrobe, "Look, I have the entire collection."