Lend Jokes

What did the poor composer say to his friend?

I am baroque, can you lend me some money?

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What is the best way to lose money?

A: Lend it to Greece.

What do you call it when you lend money to a bison?

A Buffa-Loan!

What did Mark Antony say to Van Gogh?

Lend me your ears

What did the pope give up for lent?

His job.

Why shouldn't you lend a anthropologist money?

They consider a million years ago to be Recent.

Why should you always refuse to lend an Ape money?

It's dangerous to let him put the bite on you!

Why wouldn't the frog lend his hammer to the mushroom?

Because it's a toad's tool.

Why can the Cornish always lend a hand?

They probably have a spare.

Who's there ! Celeste ! Celeste who ?

Celeste time I lend you money !

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Bite Jokes More Bite Jokes

What did the snake day to Adam after he bit the apple?

You owe Eve an O.

What did the girlfriend say to her boyfriend that was bitten by a zombie?

You're dead to me"

Friend Jokes More Friend Jokes

What did the poor composer say to his friend?

I am baroque, can you lend me some money?

What did the maggot say to his friend when he got stuck in an apple ?

Worm your way out of that one !

Van Gogh Jokes More Van Gogh Jokes

Why didn't the art thief get away?

Because he didn't have to Monet to pay the Guy to make the Van Gogh.

What did Van Gogh's mother say to him when he was sad?

Wipe away those ears.

Good Way Jokes More Good Way Jokes

What's the best way to knock out a dog?

with a woofie.

What's the best way to get home from school?

Don't go to school.

Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

What is the difference between a dog and a mailbox?

If you don't know you must lose a lot of mail.

Why didn't the recently single goose lose her job when she made a mistake?

Because she had one heck of an ex-goose

Let Jokes More Let Jokes

How do you keep getting in here?

ZOO OFFICIAL: Wait. Let's hear him out.

What Pixar movie will Rick Astley never let you borrow?

He's never gonna give you Up! Credit to my friend who doesn't even Reddit.

Spare Jokes More Spare Jokes

Why can the Cornish always lend a hand?

They probably have a spare.

When do spare parts from Japanese cars start falling out of the sky?

When it's raining Datsun cogs.

Ape Jokes More Ape Jokes

What do you call an Ape cooking a BBQ?

A Gorilla

Why did the Ape jump off the building?

He wanted to show the world the stuff he was made of!