Martial Art Jokes

What do you call a grandma that know martial arts?

A grandmartial artist. I apologise for any lost brain cells.

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What is a vegetable's favorite martial art?

He can't do martial art because he is paralyzed tip to toe.

What's the difference between Karate and Judo?

Karate is a martial art and Judo is used to make bagels.

What do call a potato that knows martial arts?

Jacket Chan

What martial art do cows practice?

Moo-thai.

Why does the bad guy always have to know some form of martial art?

Why cant they just throw stuff while screaming "stay away from me!"

What kind of martial arts do birds practice?

Wing Chun

What do you call martial arts for cows?

Mooey Thai.

What do you call a seagull that knows martial arts?

A: Steven Seagull

What do challah and martial arts have in common?

Judo

What kind of martial art does a chef do?

Kung food (Don't hurt me, I know it's bad)

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Hurt Jokes More Hurt Jokes

Why do my eyes hurt?

Because I got eye lashes.

What type of punch hurts kids the most?

A sandy hook

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

Why did the policeman stay in bed today?

he was undercover *!*

How does water stay warm during the winter?

It wears an aqua-fur.

Type Jokes More Type Jokes

What type of wind is named after both a cat and a bat?

Katabatic

Where does the thumb meet its type?

At the SPACE BAR! reddit is fun! I'm staring at the keyboard tryin' to think up a joke and voila'!

Practice Jokes More Practice Jokes

Why is the US so much better at the accurate placement of round objects than Japan?

We had two practices in 1945

What type music should you practice before doing something dangerous?

Safety measures.

Karate Jokes More Karate Jokes

What is Chuck Norris' "best karate move"?

Pork Chop!

What's the difference between Karate and Judo?

Karate is a martial art and Judo is used to make bagels.

Throw Jokes More Throw Jokes

How do you drowned a hipster?

Throw them in the mainstream. Edit: spelling because I'm 5

How many cops does it take to throw a man down the stairs?

None. He fell.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Who was that on the phone Fred?

Fred: No one important. Just some man who said it was long distance from Australia so I told him I knew that already and put the phone down !

What is the most socially unacceptable joke you know?

Preferably really dark or 'just plain wrong' jokes.

Japanese Jokes More Japanese Jokes

How many tickles does it take to make a japanese girl laugh?

Ten Tickles

What did the Japanese buck say to the doe he was courting?

OC I don't know how to put this but...I'm kind of a big deer.