Mediterranean Sea Jokes

What divides the humans from the monkeys?

The Mediterranean Sea

This joke may have profanity.

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What do you call the border between humanity and animals?

The Mediterranean Sea

Whats blue and pretty on top, and brown and kind of a bummer in the bottom?

The Mediterranean Sea.

What is it that separates humans from animals?

The Mediterranean Sea

What separates the men from the apes?

The Mediterranean Sea.

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Monkey Jokes More Monkey Jokes

Why did the monkey put a bone in his mouth?

He wanted to smoke a joint!

What do you get when you mix a monkey and a midget?

Tom Cruise

Animal Jokes More Animal Jokes

Why can't we feed the animals?

Wife: They'll get lazy and dependent and never, ever go away. Me: *looks warily at our kids*

Why was the animal unhappy?

He had a ruff week.. His life wasn't purrfect. His brother was a shellout. His mother's been a real crab lately. His family was really shellfish. He had no porpoise in life.

Ape Jokes More Ape Jokes

What do you call an Ape that's afraid of heights?

A chimp-pansy. This is my go to primatology joke.

How do you stop a thundering herd of Apes?

Hold up your arm and say "Go back you didn't say 'May I'"

Border Jokes More Border Jokes

Why did the Mexican jump the border?

To get back to Mexico

What do you call a Mexican that can't cross the border?

A Mexi

Separate Jokes More Separate Jokes

How do they separate the men from the boys in Athens?

With a crowbar.

What river separates China and India?

Answer: the Fraser River (which separates Richmond and Surrey)

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Why did the man lost in the woods catch fire?

He was heading west.

Why did the man with bronchitis get cremated..?

he was tired of coffin.

Divide Jokes More Divide Jokes

How do you divide old Rome?

Using a pair of Caesars.

How do sheep divide candy?

They all get their fair shear

Human Jokes More Human Jokes

What separates animals from humans?

The Mediterranean.

What do giraffes and humans share the same number of?

Testicles.