Oinkment Jokes

What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu?

If you have bird flu you need tweetment. If you have swine flu you need oinkment.

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What does a pig put on it's nose for a sunburn?

Oinkment!

What's the difference between Swine flu, and Bird flu?

one requires 'oinkment' and the other needs 'tweetment'. i'm sorry.

What does a pig put on his cut?

Oinkment

What's the difference between swine flu and bird flu?

For swine flu you need "Oinkment", for bird flu you need "Tweetment".

What is the difference between the avian flu and the swine flu?

One requires a tweetment and the other need an oinkment.

What do you give a sick pig?

Oinkment!

What does a pig use for his skin?

Oinkment.

What do you do for a pig with sore muscles?

Rub him with oinkment.

How did they cure the swine flu?

With oinkment.

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What did the boy say after the tailor made fun of him for not wearing pants?

Hey, why don't you cut me some slacks?

What do Vikings call the people that cut their hair?

Barberians.

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What do Mexican midgets use to cut pizza?

Little Caesars

Why can't you hear a Pterodactyl use a bathroom?

The p is silent.

Sunburn Jokes More Sunburn Jokes

What do you do when you're sunburned?

Make like a banana and peel.

What does a pig put on it's nose for a sunburn?

Oinkment!

Bird Jokes More Bird Jokes

What bird has wings but cannot fly ?

Roast turkey !

What kind of bird does not make babies?

A swallow

Cure Jokes More Cure Jokes

How to cure affluenza?

Introduce him to Warhammer.

How do mathematicians cure constipation?

They work it out with a pencil.

Pig Jokes More Pig Jokes

What position does the pig play in football?

Loinback.

Why did the pig go into the kitchen?

Because he felt like BACON!

Bird Flu Jokes More Bird Flu Jokes

How do you cure the bird flu versus swine flu?

One you use tweetment and the other, oinkment

What's the difference between swine flu and bird flu?

For swine flu you need "Oinkment", for bird flu you need "Tweetment".

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

Why did the Energizer Bunny need to lawyer up?

He was charged with battery.

What are the most useless items ever invented?

A: Condoms. If you need one, she's too old.