Past Jokes

Why are there so many women archaeologists?

Because women love digging up the past.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Coffee Mug

Why are there so many Redditor archeologists?

Because loves digging up the past.

What was the ancient language Link needed a book to translate in "A Link to the Past"?

Hyruleglyphics.

What do you call a crocodile/robot sent from the future to save the past?

Termigator (jesus christ this one's even worse than the last)

What do you call presents after you've opened them?

Pasts

Why weren't you at work last week?

Me: Why are you living in the past

Why do so many girls do archaeology degrees?

Because they love digging up the past.

What do you mean I can't change the past?

logs on to Wikipedia*

What does a cranky Japanese person suffer from?

PAST: Post Atomic Stress Disorder

Why are there so many women archeologists?

Because they love digging up the past.

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Race Car Jokes More Race Car Jokes

Why did everyone turn away when the race car drove past?

It had a SPOILER on it.

What does a flower in a race car yell?

Petal to the nettle!

Learn Jokes More Learn Jokes

What is the difference between a baby and a feminist?

The baby grows up and learns to stop crying.

Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet?

They're stuck at C for years

Tin Jokes More Tin Jokes

What did the soccer player shout to the baker who's cakes kept sticking to the tin?

LINE IT!"

What do you call a tin can that's done with High School?

A graduated cylinder!

Decide Jokes More Decide Jokes

Why did the melons decide to have a wedding?

Because they cantaloupe.

Why are you studying your Easter candy?

I'm trying to decide which came first-the chocolate chicken or the chocolate egg!"

Notice Jokes More Notice Jokes

How much less could you care?

Coworker: I don't get it. Me: I noticed.

How can you tell when a tenor is really stupid?

A: When the other tenors notice.

Old Man Jokes More Old Man Jokes

Why did the old man hate living next to the tennis courts?

He couldn't stand all the racket!

What did the woman from Finland say after seeing an old man fall in the water, knowing he couldn't swim?

Oh no, Helsinki! He Finnish!"

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

How is a woman who got her winter coat at Target similar to an officer on leave?

They both got their fur low.

Where are all the women in amateur astronomy?

At the other end of the telescope.

Spoiler Jokes More Spoiler Jokes

What is The Mountain's favorite tri-cep workout?

Spoilers) Skull crushers

Why did everyone turn away when the race car drove past?

It had a SPOILER on it.