Photo Jokes

Why can't you e-mail a photo to a Jedi?

Because attachments are forbidden.

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What's the difference between a camera and a foot?

A camera has photos and a foot has five toes. (Told to me by a 9 year old child I work with)

Why was the photo acquitted in his trial at court?

Because he was framed!

What will they now use on photos for LGBT magazines?

an airbroosh

Whats the difference between Jesus and his photo?

It takes only one nail to hang the photo

Why are photos in Latvia always such good quality?

There's no such thing as potato quality there.

How does Big Boss store his photos?

On a Solid Snake Drive 120 gb sorry :

What is the difference between a sock and a camera?

A sock takes five toes and a camera takes photos.

What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus???

It only takes one nail to hang a photo

What would the Pilsbury Doughboy be if photos of him were constantly being put on magazine covers?

A roll model.

Where do you see yourself in 10 yrs time?

Same as now - in photos and mirrors," I replied

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Whose funeral was this photo taken at?

John, serious tone: "I dunno. Let's see who's missing" possible funniest thing john has said

What is the difference between a camera and a sock?

One holds photos The other holds five

What did one plant say to another when it dropped its camera into the sea?

Photos-in-the-seas!"

Why are you showing me photos?

I'm a dog."

What did the girl say when she saw a photo on Instagram of an attractive couple at brunch?

Bae-goals

Why did people stop printing stamps with photo of Pamela Anderson?

Banta: Because people started licking the wrong side of it for pasting them on the envelopes..

How many photos of Kanye West do you suppose Kanye West has on his phone?

More than 1,000

Why is ur wife shouting at you?

Friend: she told me to upload her photo in FB, I uploaded in OLX... Mistakes do happen

What kind of photos do turtles take?

Shellfies

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Why was the wall in a store?

Because it's wal-mart.

Where did L Ron Hubbard store his dishes?

In the L Ron cupboard.

Isis Member Jokes More Isis Member Jokes

What do you call an ISIS member who loves himself?

A nISISist

What did one ISIS member say to another?

IED mubarak.."

Egg Jokes More Egg Jokes

How do fallopian tubes like there eggs in the morning?

Ovary-sy

What does Rabbits and Eggs have in common ?

Easter

Court Jokes More Court Jokes

What do you call it when a Spanish man goes to court for custody of his children?

Fight for your right to padre

What did the lazy suspect say to the court?

I haven't done anything to warrant a rest.

Allow Jokes More Allow Jokes

Why isn't Sean Connery allowed to play Super Mario Bros. any more?

He kept trying to shave the princess.

What is a crevice that is owned by someone and not allowed to be stepped into?

None of your abyss-ness

Acquit Jokes More Acquit Jokes

Why did Billy Joel get acquitted?

Because he didn't start the fire.

Why was the photo acquitted in his trial at court?

Because he was framed!

Selfie Jokes More Selfie Jokes

What do selfies make me want to do?

Shoot myself

What does cheese say to itself when taking a selfie in the mirror?

Hallooooo me!

Lgbt Jokes More Lgbt Jokes

What does an LGBT orthodontist make most of his money off of ?

bruces

Who leaves money under the pillows of children with LGBT parents ?

Surely you will have guessed - the brooth fairy.