Jedi Jokes

Why can't you e-mail a photo to a Jedi?

Because attachments are forbidden.

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What does a Jedi use to open files?

Adobe-wan Kenobi

What do Jedis wear to Oktoberfest?

Vader-hosen!

Which program do Jedi use to open PDF-files?

Adobe Wan Kenobi

What do you call a Jedi who worries about not making deadlines?

Panickin' Skywalker.

Which program do Jedis use to open PDF files?

Adobe Wan Kenobi.

Why did the Jedi cross the road?

To get to the dark side.

What do you call a flying Jedi?

A skywalker. (I'm really sorry)

What jedi is the best at opening PDF files?

Adobe Wan Kenobi

Where do Jedi go to get inked?

Tattooine.

What is a Jedi's favorite car company?

Toyoda

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How do Jedis close their programs on a Mac?

They use Force quit.

Who does a Jedi call when he forgets his keys?

A LockSith.

Why did the angry Jedi cross the road?

To get to the dark side.

What do you say to a Jedi who stole your sicilian dessert?

You owe me one cannoli."

What would Steve Urkel say if he used The Force?

Jedi do that?

Why don't Jedi mathematicians use the absolute value function?

Because only a Sith deals in absolutes.

Why are Jedis allowed to use negative numbers?

Because only Siths deal in absolutes.

What's the main ingredient in a Jedi martini?

Qui-Gon Gin

Why was the Jedi so good at the synthesizer?

He had a high MIDI-chlorian count. Test.

What program do Jedi use to PDF files?

Adobe Wan Kenobi

What do Jedi sheep sound like?

Dagobah.

What does a Jedi say after a tragic loss of life?

May my thoughts be with them".

What is a Jedi's favorite salad dressing?

Skywalker Ranch.

Why do you want to be Jedi?

Imagines using 'the force' to steal everyone's cats and building a cat army To keep the peace

What did the feminist Jedi say to Emperor Palpatine?

Check your privilege, sithlord

What pdf reader do Jedis use?

The Adobe-Wan Kenobi Reader

What are these clothes on the floor?

A dead Jedi" I replied

What's the dirtiest part of a Jedi?

The Forceskin.

What did the feminist Jedi say to Darth Tyrannus?

Check your Force privileges, Sith Lord!"

Which Jedi can save PDF files?

Adobe Wan Kenobi

How do Jedi plan for retirement?

With a Hoth IRA. I'll see myself out.

Why don't the jedi drink vodka?

Because only the Sith deal in absolut

What do you call a Jedi knight who delivers babies?

Obi-Gyn Kenobi.

What do jedi hate the most?

Forced jokes.

What do you get when you cross a Jedi with a nun?

a force of habit

Why couldn't the Jedi open the door?

He didn't use enough force...

What do Jedi say on May 4th?

May the force be with you just like every other day because they have no concept of our Gregorian calendar.

What phone networks do Jedi's use?

Yodafone

Why are Jedi terrible at Rugby?

Because "There is no Try."

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Which program do Jedi use to open PDF-files?

Adobe Wan Kenobi

What program do Jedi use to PDF files?

Adobe Wan Kenobi

Dark Jokes More Dark Jokes

Why do people smile in Africa?

So they won't run into each other in the dark.

How many people from Chernobyl does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None. They glow in the dark.

Photo Jokes More Photo Jokes

What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus???

It only takes one nail to hang a photo

Why was the photo acquitted in his trial at court?

Because he was framed!

Fly Jokes More Fly Jokes

How do you tell the difference between a Syrian hospital and an ISIS military base?

I don't know either, Johnny, just fly the drone.

Why is Peter Pan always flying?

Because he Neverlands.

Toy Jokes More Toy Jokes

Where does the pirate shop for his kid for Christmas?

Toys Arrrrrrrrrrr Us

What do you call a man with a spade on his head?

Doug Got a set of tweezers as the toy as well. Hours of fun right there.

E Jokes More E Jokes

Why did the internit paint his computer screen in little black and white squares?

He wanted to check his e-mail.

What body part is long, hard, bendable, and contains the letters p, e, n, i, s?

Spine

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

What do you get when you cross a sheep with a robot?

Steel wool

Why did the zombie cross the road?

To get his guts back. My three year old made that one up, I though it was pretty good :)

Road Jokes More Road Jokes

Why did the headless chicken cross the road?

Cause he was supposed to be-headed to the other side

Why was Snape in the middle of the road?

So you would never know what side he was on.