Public Jokes

What would you do if you won the lottery?

Two friends meet together and one asks: What would you do if you won the lottery? -I would build a brothel! Oh, and if it went wrong and you loose money? -I'd open it to the public

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What did the doctor say when he saw two fetuses being too affectionate in public?

Get a womb, you two."

What do you call someone who refuses to fart in public?

A Private Tutor.

What do you call a teacher that doesn't fart in public?

A private tooter

What do you say when you see two cleaning ladies making out in public?

Get a broom.

How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just two. One to explain to the public that everything possible is being done to solve the problem, and the other to screw the lightbulb into the water faucet.

What happens when Supper stars fart in public?

lol

What do you call a guy that never farts in public?

A privet tutor

What do you call someone who never farts in public?

A PRIVATE TUTOR

What do a Yugo and a bath have in common?

You can't step out of them in public.

Why wouldn't the teacher fart in public?

Because she was a private tutor

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What do you call a guy who does not fart in public?

A private tutor.

Why was the man arrested for looking at sets of dentures in a dentist's window?

Because it was against the law to pick your teeth in public.

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Drummer Jokes More Drummer Jokes

What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend?

Homeless.

What do you call a drummer who just broke up with his girlfriend?

Homeless

Check Jokes More Check Jokes

What did the feminist Jedi say to Emperor Palpatine?

Check your privilege, sithlord

How badly?

ME: I want you checking thesaurus in a panic haphazardly

P Jokes More P Jokes

What has 6 letters, starts with 'P', and ends a sentence?

Parole.

Why can't you tell when a Pteradactyl goes to the toilet?

Because the P is silent.

Lack Jokes More Lack Jokes

How do you get to the front page of reddit ?

Lack of originality

What do you call a god who lacks self-confidence?

An atheist. He doesn't really believe in himself.

Lottery Jokes More Lottery Jokes

What would you do if you won the lottery?

Two friends meet together and one asks: What would you do if you won the lottery? -I would build a brothel! Oh, and if it went wrong and you loose money? -I'd open it to the public

Why did the Greenlander get so angry when he didn't win the lottery?

Because he was inuit to win it

Coffee Jokes More Coffee Jokes

What is more inappropriate than a 7 year old saying "I drink coffee"?

Her saying "I drink it black, like my men"

What do Swedish people put in their coffee?

Artifical Swedeners

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

How do the Lannisters save money on new beds?

They push Two twins together to make a King

Why should you never take a swordfish out to dinner?

Because you'll get stuck with the bill, and if you don't have money to pay the restaurant will call the cods on you. Fin.

Public Toilet Jokes More Public Toilet Jokes

What do public toilets and homeless shelters have in common?

They're both full of bums

What's the difference between a public park and a public toilet?

I need to know before my court date on Monday.