Public Jokes

What would you do if you won the lottery?

Two friends meet together and one asks: What would you do if you won the lottery? -I would build a brothel! Oh, and if it went wrong and you loose money? -I'd open it to the public

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What did the doctor say when he saw two fetuses being too affectionate in public?

Get a womb, you two."

What do you call someone who refuses to fart in public?

A Private Tutor.

What do you call a teacher that doesn't fart in public?

A private tooter

What do you say when you see two cleaning ladies making out in public?

Get a broom.

How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just two. One to explain to the public that everything possible is being done to solve the problem, and the other to screw the lightbulb into the water faucet.

What happens when Supper stars fart in public?

lol

What do you call a guy that never farts in public?

A privet tutor

What do you call someone who never farts in public?

A PRIVATE TUTOR

What do a Yugo and a bath have in common?

You can't step out of them in public.

Why wouldn't the teacher fart in public?

Because she was a private tutor

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What do you call a guy who does not fart in public?

A private tutor.

Why was the man arrested for looking at sets of dentures in a dentist's window?

Because it was against the law to pick your teeth in public.

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Brothel Jokes More Brothel Jokes

What did Santa say when he went to a brothel?

Hoe hoe hoe!

What did the pirate say when he walked into the brothel?

arggg! thar she blows

Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many Software Engineers does it take to change a lightbulb?

None- that's hardware.

How many Ellen Paos does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None. The mods do that for her.

Monday Jokes More Monday Jokes

What do you call a person who's happy on a Monday?

Unemployed.

Why does Garfield hate Mondays?

He doesn't have a job.

America Jokes More America Jokes

Where did vampires go to first in America?

New-fang-land.

What does America and my Milk have in common?

Both will go bad in 9 days.

Drummer Jokes More Drummer Jokes

Whats a Drummers favorite Pokemon?

Rattata

How can you tell when the stage is level?

The drummer is drooling equally from both sides of his mouth.

Country Jokes More Country Jokes

What do you call a country of grizzlies that is always stoned?

A hibearnation.

Why do clouds make good Kings?

Because they have rain over every country in the world.

Coffee Jokes More Coffee Jokes

Who's the most popular guy in the nudist camp?

The one who can carry two cups of coffee AND a dozen donurs!

Where do bourgeois monarchists get their coffee?

Tsarbucks

Email Jokes More Email Jokes

Why couldn't the depressed person get his email?

He had a bad Outlook.

Why do Gypsy's walk funny?

Because of their Crystal Balls EDIT: I'm not sure if anyone's posted this before my mum's sister emailed her from across the globe.(New Zealand) I laughed so hard I thought I'd put it here. Credit goes to my Mum's sister though.