Vulture Jokes

Why'd the vulture check his bag?

The airline didn't allow carrion luggage.

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Why did the vulture have to check some luggage at the gate?

It was only allowed one piece of carrion.

Why are commercial flights always cheaper for vultures?

All their luggage is carrion.

Why do vultures hate flying?

Because they have to pay extra for Carrion! Budum tsssss

What do you get when you cross a vulture with a machine gun?

As far away as possible. shameful

Why do vultures find it easy to fly?

They only ever have carrion baggage.

What do you call a vulture with no beak?

A head banger.

What do you get when you cross Kansas with a vulture?

Carrion my wayward son

What does a vulture bring onto a plane?

Carrion luggage

What did the vulture say when the airline agent asked if he wanted to check his luggage?

No, thanks, it's just carrion...

Whats the similarity between a reddit user and a vulture?

Both are dead inside.

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They keep saying check, mate.

How did the Redditor get stuck in a loop?

I don't know, check the post above me.

Piece Jokes More Piece Jokes

How do you get an anorexic chick in bed?

Well, it ain't a piece of cake.

What do you get if you ask a former presidential candidate to write a piece of music about a formula for solving a problem based on a sequence of specified actions?

An algorithm.

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did the dog sit in the shade?

It didn't want to be a hotdog. *ba dum tsss *ba dum tish idk

Why didn't the cargo ship want to leave the bay?

Because it was a freight!

Airplane Jokes More Airplane Jokes

What do you call a pizza chef on an airplane?

A flying saucer.

Why did Jesus run off the airplane?

He didn't like the Pilate

Edit Jokes More Edit Jokes

What did the spectator say when the magician transformed Dracula into 2?

Miraculous. Edited: tough crowd

How does Walter Palmer like his eggs?

Poached. Thank you, I'm here all week. EDIT: this got no upvotes and I don't think it deserved any

Hate Jokes More Hate Jokes

What dance do hippies hate?

A square dance.

What does a redneck garden gnome hate more than anything?

Transplants

Airline Jokes More Airline Jokes

How long is the flight?

A Polish man calls up an airline. "How long is the flight from Chicago to Warsaw?" "One minute..." "Thank you."

What airline allows you to pee in cruise?

Wizz Air

Machine Gun Jokes More Machine Gun Jokes

What do you get when you cross a vulture with a machine gun?

As far away as possible. shameful

What lives in a tree and is dangerous?

A crow with a machine gun.