Atmosphere Jokes

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Styrofoam cup?

A dead baby doesn't harm the atmosphere when you burn it.

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How do your organize a space party?

You planet! (It won't turn out well though because it has no atmosphere.)

Why don't they have a concert on the moon?

No atmosphere

What do you say to change the atmosphere at a dinner party?

If were all here, who's looking after Madeline?"

Why did the restaurant on the moon fail?

They barely had any atmosphere.

Why aren't football stadiums built in outer space?

Because there is no atmosphere!

Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

There was no atmosphere

What was the atmosphere like in the silent wooden part of a hospital?

It was an oakward experience.

Why can't you have a party on the moon?

There's just no atmosphere

What would you call Neil Armstrong had he burnt up in the atmosphere returning to earth instead of landing safely?

An unfortu-naut... God that was horrible....

Did you hear about the new restaurant on the moon?

The food is great, but there’s just no atmosphere.

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Football Stadium Jokes More Football Stadium Jokes

Why was the football stadium so cold?

Because of all the fans.

What lights up a football stadium ?

A football match !

Land Jokes More Land Jokes

What's the difference between CNN and Al Jazeera?

CNN shows the missiles taking off and Al Jazeera shows them landing.

Why is the sea salty?

Because the land does not wave back.

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

When you look in the mirror, what do you see?

Me: I see myself you friggin idiot. Let me see your degree

How do people look at the internet?

Me: How Him: With their google-y eyes

Fail Jokes More Fail Jokes

Why would the Holocaust have failed if the victims were Islamic?

Because it would have been impossible to get a Muslim to take a shower.

What did the chicken say ?

What did they chicken say to his friends after being sent to the hospital after failing to cross the road ?. Don't worry ill get over it.

Hospital Jokes More Hospital Jokes

What is the worst place to hide in a hospital?

The ICU (I-see-you!)

What did the doctor say to the witch in hospital?

With any luck you'll be able to get up for a spell.

Mood Jokes More Mood Jokes

What's the leader of north korea's wife wear when she's not in the mood?

a Kimono

Why did the man turn on the lights in a depression clinic?

He wanted to lighten the mood in such a dim atmosphere.

Concert Jokes More Concert Jokes

What did Journey say to the critic as he stormed out of their concert?

Don't stop! Be leaving!" Just a joke I thought up the other day.

What do you get when you go to a concert in Paris?

Shot.

Neil Armstrong Jokes More Neil Armstrong Jokes

Why did Neil Armstrong get to set foot on the moon before Buzz Aldrin?

They wrestled over it. Neil had the stronger arm.

What did Neil Armstrong do after walking on the moon before Buzz Aldrin did?

gize.