Concert Jokes

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl band in the concert?

Because the P is silent

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What did Chad Kroeger say after leaving a concert of Justin Bieber?

I want my Nickleback....

Which rock band always wash their hands before a concert?

OCDC

What concert costs 45 cents?

A concert that costs 45 cents.

What did the midget give her boyfriend after his concert?

A Standing Blow-vation.

What did Journey say to the critic as he stormed out of their concert?

Don't stop! Be leaving!" Just a joke I thought up the other day.

What do you get when you go to a concert in Paris?

Shot.

Why don't they have a concert on the moon?

No atmosphere

Why did the rockstar turkey get kicked out of the concert?

Because he tryptophan.

Why can't an orchestra made of OB/GYN doctors ever get good enough to perform a concert?

Because the C-section is always messy.

What concert is worth 45 cents?

50 cent with Nickelback

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Why was Darth Vader upset when he heard George Michael will only play new songs at his concerts?

He found his lack of Faith disturbing.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the concert?

He had no body to go with.

How Dave Grohl spent his night in his hotel room after the concert in Gothenburg, Sweden?

He watched movie Cast Away (starring Tom Hanks) and ate some potato chips.

What's the best part about going to a concert in Paris?

Free Shots

Who's concerts cost only 45 cents to attend?

50 Cent ft. Nickelback

What concert can you go to for 45 cents?

50 Cent ft. Nickelback

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What concert can you go to for 45 cents?

50 Cent ft. Nickelback

Who's concerts cost only 45 cents to attend?

50 Cent ft. Nickelback

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Why can't the incredible hulk find a girlfriend?

Because all the girls know he just wants to smash

Why didn't the scarecrow want dessert?

Because he was stuffed!

Wet Jokes More Wet Jokes

How did the florist act after getting her dream job?

Got so excited she wet her plants.

What do you get if you cross a pond with snowshoes?

Wet.

Paris Jokes More Paris Jokes

Why are Paris's streets lined with trees?

German soldiers like to march in the shade.

Why is Paris the city of love?

Hard P and a soft A. Modified from comment section of reddit

Ocdc Jokes More Ocdc Jokes

What do you call it when you have to listen to rock music obsessively?

OC/DC

What do you call a rock band with a perfectionist in it?

OCDC

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

What kind of root is only easy to find on paper?

A square one.*

Why do electricians make good mediators?

Because they're good at finding common ground.

Hospital Jokes More Hospital Jokes

What vehicle do bicycle riders take to the hospital?

An Ambulance Armstrong

What do you get when you cross a poisonous snake with a horse?

A: I dunno, but if it bites you, you can ride it to the hospital!

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

What are your go to jokes?

I was at an event the other day and someone asked "So... anyone know any jokes?" What's everyone's "go to" joke in social situations?

Why is a cow that he jumps?

Because he higher and higher. (I translated the joke from Dutch, and yeah it's supposed to not make any sense, it just sounds funny, in Dutch at least. :-$)