Concert Jokes

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl band in the concert?

Because the P is silent

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What did Chad Kroeger say after leaving a concert of Justin Bieber?

I want my Nickleback....

Which rock band always wash their hands before a concert?

OCDC

What concert costs 45 cents?

A concert that costs 45 cents.

What did the midget give her boyfriend after his concert?

A Standing Blow-vation.

What did Journey say to the critic as he stormed out of their concert?

Don't stop! Be leaving!" Just a joke I thought up the other day.

What do you get when you go to a concert in Paris?

Shot.

Why don't they have a concert on the moon?

No atmosphere

Why did the rockstar turkey get kicked out of the concert?

Because he tryptophan.

Why can't an orchestra made of OB/GYN doctors ever get good enough to perform a concert?

Because the C-section is always messy.

What concert is worth 45 cents?

50 cent with Nickelback

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Why was Darth Vader upset when he heard George Michael will only play new songs at his concerts?

He found his lack of Faith disturbing.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the concert?

He had no body to go with.

How Dave Grohl spent his night in his hotel room after the concert in Gothenburg, Sweden?

He watched movie Cast Away (starring Tom Hanks) and ate some potato chips.

What's the best part about going to a concert in Paris?

Free Shots

Who's concerts cost only 45 cents to attend?

50 Cent ft. Nickelback

What concert can you go to for 45 cents?

50 Cent ft. Nickelback

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Why did the leper chase the leopard?

Because she wanted the D. (I dreamed this joke last night. Not bad for a dream joke.)

Where does the thumb meet its type?

At the SPACE BAR! reddit is fun! I'm staring at the keyboard tryin' to think up a joke and voila'!

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What do you call a rock band with a perfectionist in it?

OCDC

Which rock band has 4 people but doesn't make music?

Mount Rushmore

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How do you stop a baby from walking in circles?

Pin its other hand to the ground.

What does a Russian woman say to stop her husband from abusing her?

Vladislov, baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more... I'm sorry..

Hospital Jokes More Hospital Jokes

Who is the coolest Doctor in the hospital?

The hip Doctor!

Why did Elton John have to go to hospital after the Queen concert?

They found traces of Mercury in him.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What do you call women who are faster than me?

Virgins. Sorry if it's a repost, I'm fairly new here.

Why do woman out live men?

They don't have wives

C Section Jokes More C Section Jokes

What does the doctor say to the woman who has to get a c section?

There's not enough womb!

Why can't an orchestra made of OB/GYN doctors ever get good enough to perform a concert?

Because the C-section is always messy.

Justin Bieber Jokes More Justin Bieber Jokes

What's the difference between Justin Bieber and Pinocchio?

Some day, Pinocchio's going to be a real boy.

What's the difference between Justin Bieber and a lawyer?

Some adults like lawyers.

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Why doesn't cancer let anyone in a music store?

It doesn't want anyone to find The Cure.

What is a crack head's favourite song?

Q: What is a crack head's favourite song A: I wanna rock!!! Well I found it funny anyway..