Elect Jokes

How did the U. S. elect an Orange as president?

Gerrymandarin.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What do you call a dog who got re-elected for mayor?

A dog with pawlitical experience.

What's one advantage of electing a woman president of the United States?

We wouldn't have to pay her as much.

What's the difference between an elected official and a piece of garbage?

Garbage gets thrown out.

How do you get elected president of my pants?

By the vote of the Erectional College...

Why should we elect Gabe Newell as President of the United States?

So there won't be a World War III.

How do you know Bernie Sanders got elected?

All your stuff has been donated to charity

What do you get when you elect Bernie Sander's son as president?

A son Bern

What do you call the first black guy elected to the White House?

Precedent.

Why do you need to be 35 to be elected president?

So women don't get elected.

How do you know when a joke has gone too far?

It's elected President.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

Why are kids with DS getting elected prom kings and queens?

Either way, they're going down in history.

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Supporter Jokes More Supporter Jokes

Why do you see so many Bernie Posts on r/all?

Because supporters of other candidates are out working or voting.

Why won't anti vaxers ever win an election?

All their supporters are home with sick kids

Pleasure Jokes More Pleasure Jokes

What do you call a woman who pleasures herself with a vegetable?

Mrs Hawking

What do you call a woman who pleasures herself with Vegetables?

Mrs Hawking

Candidate Jokes More Candidate Jokes

What's your strength?

Candidate: I fall in love easily. Interviewer: What's your weakness? Candidate: Those blue eyes of yours.

What's your strongest weakness?

Candidate: ... *Realises stupid question & thinks of cover up M: It's a trick question. You're hired!

Election Jokes More Election Jokes

How do you know Putin's doing well this election?

He's taking over the Poles.

How often do Chinese people have elections?

When they wake up every morning.

Believe Jokes More Believe Jokes

How many atheists does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. They don't believe in a higher power.

Why are Democrats stupid enough to believe in climate change?

Because they were vaccinated as children.

Anti Jokes More Anti Jokes

What did the doctor give the Asari with an STD?

Anti-biotics

What's the best things about Anti-Jokes?

They have a large following!

U. S. Jokes More U. S. Jokes

What did the U.S president say before starting WW3?

Nukes... You're fired!

What do Filipinos call Canada?

Upper U.S.

35 Jokes More 35 Jokes

How many men are in each corner?

3/5

What's the most racist fraction?

3/5