Tumblr Jokes

Where do Tumblr users go to pray?

The Cis-Teen Chapel

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Why aren't Tumblr users good farm contractors?

Because they always take a fence

What did the square of cloth identify as on tumblr?

Nap-kin

What do you get when you mix triangles with Tumblr?

Trigger-Nometry

Why do people in tumblr like quantum computing?

Because it's non binary

What is Tumblr's least favourite show?

NCIS

What is the biggest gender on Tumblr?

Whale-Kin

What does Darth Vader identify as on Tumblr?

Ana-kin

What dries your clothes but can also make you writhe around in agony?

A tumblr.

What do you get when you cross Tumblr with anything?

A bunch of offended Tumblrinas

What do you call a Tumblr user who identifies as a device which inflates a tire?

A pumpkin!

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What's the name of the car of a hipster batman?

Tumblr.

How can you tell if you bought lube from Tumblr?

Because it Lubri-Can't Even!

Why do girls who use Tumblr work so many odd jobs?

Because they literally can't even.

How many Tumblr women does it take to change a light bulb?

I WILL NOT BE A VICTIM!

Why does Tumblr hate symmetrical shapes?

Because they can't even

What is Kanye West's favourite kind of omelette?

Omeletteyoufinish -stolen from raininginreverse on tumblr.

Why is Tumblr so odd?

Because they can't even.

What do you call a sleepy Tumblr user?

Napkin.

Why does the lemon feel uncomfortable making friends outside of tumblr?

Because it has cis-trust issues

How are 4chan and Tumblr alike?

They usually announce a trigger warning before mentioning a school shooting

What kind of jeans does mario wear?

Denim denim denim.(http://youtu.be/rdnTvgK2o5I) shamelessly stolen from tumblr

What's the difference between tumblr and a gun?

The gun has only one trigger

Why did the Tumblr user get cut up on Halloween?

She identified as pump-kin.

What is Tumblr's favourite branch of maths?

Trigger-nometry... I'll see myself out.

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Bunch Jokes More Bunch Jokes

What do you call a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench?

The NBA.

What happens when a bunch of ferrets get together?

None of your business.

Tumblr User Jokes More Tumblr User Jokes

Why did the Tumblr user get cut up on Halloween?

She identified as pump-kin.

What kind of drugs to tumblr users take?

Anti-oppressants.

Nap Kin Jokes More Nap Kin Jokes

What did the square of cloth identify as on tumblr?

Nap-kin

What is in common between a napkin and a person?

If you sleep with a person, he/she is ur nap-kin.

People Jokes More People Jokes

How many survivors of nuclear war does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. People that glow in the dark don't need lights.

What have Disney and the U.K. got in common?

Both dropped the EU And screwed over a lot of people

Cloth Jokes More Cloth Jokes

What's the best way to wipe a computer server?

A cloth.

What did one bolt of cloth say to the other bolt of cloth after hurting its feelings?

I'm sari.

Agony Jokes More Agony Jokes

What happened when a deadly rattle snake bit a witch ?

He died in agony !

What dries your clothes but can also make you writhe around in agony?

A tumblr.

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

What has a million legs but can't walk?

Jerry's Kids.

What did the emu say to the nurse?

A: Mend her bones or walk the plank

Device Jokes More Device Jokes

What's the difference between USA and USB?

One connects to all your devices & accesses your data, and the other is a hardware standard

What's the difference between USB and USA?

One connects to all your devices and access your data, one connects to all your devices and access your data.