Tumblr Jokes

Where do Tumblr users go to pray?

The Cis-Teen Chapel

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Why aren't Tumblr users good farm contractors?

Because they always take a fence

What did the square of cloth identify as on tumblr?

Nap-kin

What do you get when you mix triangles with Tumblr?

Trigger-Nometry

Why do people in tumblr like quantum computing?

Because it's non binary

What is Tumblr's least favourite show?

NCIS

What is the biggest gender on Tumblr?

Whale-Kin

What does Darth Vader identify as on Tumblr?

Ana-kin

What dries your clothes but can also make you writhe around in agony?

A tumblr.

What do you get when you cross Tumblr with anything?

A bunch of offended Tumblrinas

What do you call a Tumblr user who identifies as a device which inflates a tire?

A pumpkin!

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What's the name of the car of a hipster batman?

Tumblr.

How can you tell if you bought lube from Tumblr?

Because it Lubri-Can't Even!

Why do girls who use Tumblr work so many odd jobs?

Because they literally can't even.

How many Tumblr women does it take to change a light bulb?

I WILL NOT BE A VICTIM!

Why does Tumblr hate symmetrical shapes?

Because they can't even

What is Kanye West's favourite kind of omelette?

Omeletteyoufinish -stolen from raininginreverse on tumblr.

Why is Tumblr so odd?

Because they can't even.

What do you call a sleepy Tumblr user?

Napkin.

Why does the lemon feel uncomfortable making friends outside of tumblr?

Because it has cis-trust issues

How are 4chan and Tumblr alike?

They usually announce a trigger warning before mentioning a school shooting

What kind of jeans does mario wear?

Denim denim denim.(http://youtu.be/rdnTvgK2o5I) shamelessly stolen from tumblr

What's the difference between tumblr and a gun?

The gun has only one trigger

Why did the Tumblr user get cut up on Halloween?

She identified as pump-kin.

What is Tumblr's favourite branch of maths?

Trigger-nometry... I'll see myself out.

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Square Jokes More Square Jokes

Why do dogs run in circles ?

Because its hard to run in squares !

Why did the pentagon change it's name to the square?

Because they were cutting corners.

Mix Jokes More Mix Jokes

What do you call a pony mixed with a robot?

RoboClop....so sorry

What do you get when you mix a Mexican and an octopus?

I don't know, but it sure can wash a lot of dishes.

Triangle Jokes More Triangle Jokes

When is a triangle a rectangle?

When it fails

What's the difference between a triangle and Manchester United ?

A triangle has three points

Car Jokes More Car Jokes

What do I look for in a car?

A sound-proof cabin so I can sing every rap lyric regardless of the neighborhood I'm driving through.

What jumps up and down in front of a car ?

Froglights !

Trigger Nometry Jokes More Trigger Nometry Jokes

What are feminists best at in mathematics?

TRIGGER-nometry

What's a feminist's favorite subject?

Trigger-nometry

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

Why did the women cross the road?

Well thats not the point what is she doing out of the kitchen !!!

Why did the dog cross the road?

A: Because it was the chickens day off.

Tumblr User Jokes More Tumblr User Jokes

Why aren't Tumblr users good farm contractors?

Because they always take a fence

What do you call a Tumblr user who identifies as a device which inflates a tire?

A pumpkin!

Lube Jokes More Lube Jokes

What do you do when your wife starts smoking?

Slow down and apply lube

How do you get your girlfriend to stop smoking?

Slow down and use some lube