Hockey Jokes

With the NHL season getting started tonight. I am wondering what are you best jokes making fun off sports teams. All Sports (Baseball,hockey,football, soccer etc).

Why didn't Jesus like to play hockey?

He didn't like getting nailed to the boards.

Why dosn't Jesus christ play hockey?

Because he'd always get nailed into the boards

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Why can't dogs play hockey?

They always get called for roughing.

How did the blonde break her leg playing hockey with the Toronto Maple Leafs?

A: She fell out of the tree.

Why can't Jesus play hockey?

He keeps getting NAILED TO THE BOARDS!...

Why is Riot Fest going to be in Toronto?

They play music, not hockey.

Why aren't Hindu and Chinese people allowed to play hockey?

A: Because everytime they go into the corner they open up a convienent store.

What did they call it when NHL officials refused to allow a hamburger to play hockey in the league?

Rink injustice!

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Jerry Seinfeld Jokes More Jerry Seinfeld Jokes

What's the deal with Jerry Seinfeld?

Did you ever notice he seems to start off all of his jokes in one of two ways

How does Jerry Seinfeld play ice hockey?

With his Shtick.

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

What language does a boxer who punches jokes speak?

Punjabi-ng.

What's the best things about Anti-Jokes?

They have a large following!

Fun Jokes More Fun Jokes

What kind of fun do priests have?

Nun

What do you call it when you make fun of someone's gambling addiction?

Slot shaming.

Board Jokes More Board Jokes

Why do they call boats "she"?

Because the wives had to get on board somehow.

Why doesn't Jesus play hockey anymore?

He kept on getting nailed into the boards.

Nhl Jokes More Nhl Jokes

What did they call it when NHL officials refused to allow a hamburger to play hockey in the league?

Rink injustice!

What will ESPN talk about if both the Hawks and Rockets make it to the NBA final?

The NHL playoffs

Corner Jokes More Corner Jokes

What do you call a brunette and three blondes in a corner?

A: You don't you see if you've got 3 condoms.

What's big, green and cries in the corner?

The Incredible Sulk

Toronto Jokes More Toronto Jokes

Why do Newfies want Qubec to separate?

So it's a shorter drive to Toronto!

Why did Toronto host the (hockey) World Junior Championships?

They wanted to see what a winning team looked like.

Cancel Jokes More Cancel Jokes

Whopper at BK You hear BK is now selling a black whopper?

They are already cancelling it because it will never work and everyone wants it for free ...... lmao

What do you call an aborted Czechoslovakian?

A cancelled Chzeck.