Monk Jokes

What do you call a monk that likes vaporwave?

A S C E T I C

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Why didn't the monk sell his temple?

Thought of this one on my own while playing WoW a couple days ago and I'm pretty sure it hasn't been told before. I like corny jokes. I Googled it and didn't find anything (:

What do you call a monk that cooks potatoes?

A friar? A chip monk?

Why did the monks go to the casino?

Tibet.

Why do monks wear the same clothes every day?

Because old habits die hard.

What's the most fun a monk can have?

Nun

Why does Bane and a monk get along well in the morning?

Because the friar rises!

What does a monk say when you evict him?

Namaste

What is a religious gorilla called?

A monk-ey

When is it okay for monks to use e-mail?

When there are no attachments

What do you call a monk that operates a door unlocking service?

A monkey. (p.s. I have a wonderful, terrible love for bad jokes)

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What does a Christmas tree and a monk have in common?

They both have ornamental balls

What did the monk say to the hot dog vendor?

Make me one with everything.

Why do monks wear such plain clothes?

It's a habit.

What do you call a place monks go for Halloween?

A monascary

Why couldn't the monk who flew a helicopter understand the monk who flew commercial jets?

Because he was on a higher plane.

What do you you say when a monk tries to kick you out of the monastery ?

Namaste

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Play Jokes More Play Jokes

Why does Helen Keller play the piano with only one hand?

Because she uses the other one to sing.

What was Arnold Schwarzenegger's answer when asked which historical person he would like to play in a movie?

I'll be Bach.

Helicopter Jokes More Helicopter Jokes

What do you call a helicopter with a bad paint job?

A patchy gunship

What does an helicopter and pants have in common?

They both moust go down in emergency.

Thought Jokes More Thought Jokes

Where's the nearest cycle path you meant?

Thought you said psychopath.

When Bruce Banner gets constipated do you think he turns into the Hulk?

just one of the thoughts I have during important business meetings

Buddhist Monk Jokes More Buddhist Monk Jokes

What do you get if you cross a Buddhist monk and a 16 year old blonde cheerleader?

Arrested for procurement of a minor. Trust me on this one.

Why did the Buddhist monk refuse Novocain?

Because he wanted to transcend dental medication.

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

What does one chauvinist say to the other?

There's a thousand things I'd like to do in my life, and those are just the pretty ones!

What type of sushi does Bob Seger like?

That Old Thai Moroccan Roll.

Fit Jokes More Fit Jokes

How can you tell your boyfriend has gained weight?

You fit into his clothes.

How do you fit an elephant in a thimble?

You take the "I" out of "thimble" and the "F" out of "way."

Dorito Jokes More Dorito Jokes

What did the Dorito farmer say to the other Dorito farmer?

Cool Ranch!

What could Dora the Explorer's kids be called?

Doritos

Friar Jokes More Friar Jokes

What do you call a holy man who works at McDonald's?

A Friar

What do you call a friar in prison?

A felonious monk