Thanksgive Dinner Jokes

What do thanksgiving dinner and the refugee crisis in Europe have in common?

Turkey and grease

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Why couldn't the pirate have gravy with his thanksgiving dinner?

Because someone stole his boat.

What will Putin be having for Thanksgiving dinner?

Turkey.

What will you have for Thanksgiving dinner?

Turkey"

What did the hoodrats have for thanksgiving dinner?

Twerkey

What's the best part of having Miley Cyrus over for thanksgiving dinner?

Unlimited twerky

Why do Native Americans like being invited to Thanksgiving dinners?

Because usually they're stuck with reservations.

Why don't you want a turkey at your thanksgiving dinner?

Because it'll gobble up everything.

What did the green onion say to the Thanksgiving dinner?

I ain't no chive, Turkey."

What's the best way to prepare a turkey for Thanksgiving dinner?

Just be *honest* with it man...

Why did the monster get a ticket at Thanksgiving dinner?

He was exceeding the feed limit!

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What did the mathematician say after Thanksgiving dinner?

1)/8"

Why was the cook late to Thanksgiving dinner?

He lost track of thyme. Happy Thanksgiving.

What are you going to have for Thanksgiving dinner?

Putin: "Turkey"

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How many syllables does the word "Gloria" have?

CATHOLICS: 18

What has 18 legs and catches flies?

A: A baseball team

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Why does it smell so bad in Russia?

Everybody loves Putin!

How do you know Putin's doing well this election?

He's taking over the Poles.

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What's that, turkey?

GOBBLE GOBBLE Timmy fell in a well GOBBLE GOBBLE breaks turkey's neck no time for your riddles, in the oven you go

Why do turkeys always gobble?

Why do turkeys always gobble? They havent been taught good table manners!

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Where should you go if you lost a corner?

To the Eagles, they can get corner-backs.

What did the farmer's daughter say when she lost her virginity?

Get off me dad you're crushing my smokes! Or "That'll do pig, that'll do." I have heard it both ways.

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What do you call Miley Cyrus with a gun?

A shooting star

What's the best part of having Miley Cyrus over for thanksgiving dinner?

Unlimited twerky

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Why did the emo chicken go across the road?

He was afraid to go down the tracks.

What's the worst news for a NASCAR driver before a race?

The track is alright."

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Why was the cook late to Thanksgiving dinner?

He lost track of thyme. Happy Thanksgiving.

What song do turkeys sing on Thanksgiving Day?

God save the kin Happy Thanksgiving!

Reservation Jokes More Reservation Jokes

Why didn't the native Americans go out to dinner?

They lost their reservations.

Why did the Native American quit his desk job at the Marriot?

He didn't like dealing with reservations.