Hard Time Jokes

Why are negative parabolas so introverted?

They have a hard time opening up

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Why does Kylo Ren have a hard time making friends?

Because for most of his life, he's Ben Solo.

What's the similarity of a dough and a human?

If they are thick, they have a hard time to rise

Who is a man's best friend?

The sock, he's always there in hard times.

What happened to the guy who grabbed the Viagra instead of the Allegra?

he had a hard time with his allergies

This joke may have profanity.

Why did the laptop memory have such a hard time in school?

Because he was SO-DIMM!

Why did the pony have such a hard time talking?

He was a little horse

What did the Machop say to the guy who was giving him a hard time?

You're really bustin' Machops!

Why do physicists have such a hard time figuring out why their experiments fail Monday through Thursday?

Causal fridays.

Why do mathematicians have a hard time moving on in relationships?

Because they're always trying to find the x. They don't know y, either.

What do bad dancers have in common with Michael J Fox trying to use the soft serve ice cream machine?

They both have a hard time pulling off a twist.

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Why can't you hear a dog whistle?

Because they have a hard time puckering their lips the right way.

Why was the dog so depressed?

He was having a hard time looking up.

Why do Pandas have such a hard time mating in captivity?

Because all of their broads are in Atlanta

Why does Shakira have such a hard time sleeping at night?

Because her hips won't lie.

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Monday Jokes More Monday Jokes

What do you call a person who enjoy mondays?

Unemployed

How is today Monday?

It was Friday only a few hours ago...

Thursday Jokes More Thursday Jokes

Why do physicists have such a hard time figuring out why their experiments fail Monday through Thursday?

Causal fridays.

What do you call it when a transcendentalist author looks at old photos?

Thoreau Back Thursday

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

Why do wallets make so much noise?

Because money talks.

What do you get when you mix a public speaker with someone who had tourettes?

A clock! One provides the tic, the other provides the talk Credit to my Autistic Big Bro

Relationship Jokes More Relationship Jokes

What is a relationship?

It's the one that always sinks....

Why is it a bad idea to get in a relationship with a statue?

Because it's not going anywhere.

Y Jokes More Y Jokes

What is a Farmer's favorite pick-up line?

Girl. You look so good that I wish I could plant you and grow a whole field of y'all!

Why don't X and Z get along with Y?

Because Y so serious

Sarcasm Jokes More Sarcasm Jokes

What's the difference between sarcasm and a serious statement?

What're you asking me for I have Asperger's.

Why can't you use sarcasm with a kleptomaniac?

Because they take things literally.

Position Jokes More Position Jokes

What position makes the ugliest children?

Ask your parents

What position does your brother play in the school football team ?

Jay: I think he's one of the drawbacks !

Similarity Jokes More Similarity Jokes

What's the similarity between Santa Claus and your doorbell ringing at 3am?

It's your dad.

What's the similarity between free healthcare and good jokes?

Americans don't get them.