Position Jokes

What did the witch say when her position was terminated?

You can't fire me! I snappopcrackleaaaaaargh!!!!

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How do you get to a position of power in a science lab?

Work over time

What's the difference between a Harley and a hoover?

The position of the dirtbag.

Why was Heisenberg such a bad lover?

A: When he got the momentum, he couldn't find the position, and when he found the position, he couldn't muster up the momentum.

What's the difference between a Harley Davidson and a Hoover vaccuum?

The position of the dirt bag.

Why do some writers have a hard time graphing equations?

because they spend too much time with the x-position

What do computer programmers and aged-care nurses have in common?

They both worry about the position of colons.

Why is Stephen Hawking so controversial?

He never changes his position.

How do Japanese politicians say they got their positions?

With erections.

What do you call a fruit that argues against the position it supports?

The Devil's advocado.

What's the difference between a vacuum and a Harley Davidson?

The position of the dirtbag

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Whats the difference between a Hoover and a Harley?

The position of the dirtbag.

What position makes the ugliest children?

Ask your parents

What position does the pig play in football?

Loinback.

How do you find Illuminati's secret hideout?

You triangulate their position!

Why are quantum physicists bad lovers?

When they find the position, they can't find the momentum. When they find the momentum, they can't find the position.

What happens when U change position too fast?

You get an unpleasant vowel movement.

Why do the Heisenberg operators for position and momentum work from home?

Because they won't commute.

What position does your brother play in the school football team ?

Jay: I think he's one of the drawbacks !

What's your heigth and position?

Pilot: Well I'm 6 foot tall and I'm sitting front left.

Which positions does a violist use?

A: First third and emergency.

What position do u play?

ME: I'm a *thinks back to the only game I watched* wide-retriever.

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What do you call it when Usain Bolt is standing next to your mom?

A runner in scoring position.

Did you hear about the runner who was criticized?

He just took it in stride

Positive Jokes More Positive Jokes

What is the difference between a battery and a woman?

A battery has a positive side.

What does a battery have that a women hasn't?

A positive side....

Heisenberg Jokes More Heisenberg Jokes

Why was Heisenberg such a bad lover?

A: When he got the momentum, he couldn't find the position, and when he found the position, he couldn't muster up the momentum.

Why was Heisenberg's wife unhappy?

Whenever he had the energy, he didn't have the time.

Terminate Jokes More Terminate Jokes

What's the difference between Victoria Taylor and Arnold Schwarzenegger?

One was fired, the other was terminated

What did the witch say when her position was terminated?

You can't fire me! I snappopcrackleaaaaaargh!!!!

Physicist Jokes More Physicist Jokes

What did the physicist say to the suicidal guy on the bridge?

Don't do it! You have potential!

What did the physicist have for lunch?

Fission chips.

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

Why didn't Gordon Ramsay like the Girl Scout cream pies?

He found a hair in one.

What did Julius Caesar ask when finding a color to paint the Senate?

Ecru, Brute "

Hoover Jokes More Hoover Jokes

What's the difference between a Hoover and a Harley?

The location of the dirtbag.

What's the difference between a Harley and a hoover?

The position of the dirtbag.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

Whats the difference between a black man and Batman?

Batman can go to a store without robin.

What's the difference between a millennial and a mutual fund?

A mutual fund will eventually mature and make money