Mercede Jokes

What's the difference between a Mercedes and Princess Diana?

The Mercedes can easily reach 40.

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Whats the difference between a guy who has a new Mercedes and a guy who has an old Mercedes?

The guy who has a new Mercedes is rich. The guy who has an old Mercedes has been rich for a longer time.

Why did the rich guy crash his car?

He wanted to see how the Mercedes bends

How can you tell a rich Swiss from a poor Swiss?

The poor swiss washes his Mercedes by himself

What's the difference between a bag of dead babies and a mercedes?

I don't have a mercedes in my garage!

What is the difference between a Mercedes and a Lexus?

Princess Diana wouldn't be caught dead in a Lexus...

What's the difference between a Volvo and a Mercedes?

Princess Diana wouldn't be caught dead in a Volvo

What's the difference between a porcupine and a Mercedes?

A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.

What's the common thing between Mercedes and iphone 6?

Mercedes Benz...

What did Mike Meyers say to Eddie Murphy after Eddie bought him a brand new Mercedes?

DANKE!"

What's the difference between a Mercedes and a bunch of dead babies?

I don't have a Mercedes in my garage.

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Danke Jokes More Danke Jokes

What do Germans look at on the internet?

Danke memes

What does a German say when you finally explain a funny meme to him?

Danke

Swiss Jokes More Swiss Jokes

Why do Christians like Swiss cheese?

It's holey.

How can you tell a rich Swiss from a poor Swiss?

The poor swiss washes his Mercedes by himself

Outside Jokes More Outside Jokes

What's the deference between and porcupine and a BMW?

A porcupine has its pricks on the outside

What's the difference between the Earth and my sock?

The Earth's crust is on the outside.

40 Jokes More 40 Jokes

Why would Sally sell seashells by the seashore?

There are plenty there that are free. Just walk and you are bound to find at least 40. Idiot

What has 40 teeth and holds a monster at bay?

My zipper.

Mercedes Benz Jokes More Mercedes Benz Jokes

Why was the Mercedes Benz on sales?

Because they've removed 6 rows of yellow LED strips...

What's the difference between a porcupine and a Mercedes Benz?

The porcupine's pricks are on the outside.

Catch Jokes More Catch Jokes

What bait do you use to catch a space fish?

A worm hole

Why was the chef fired?

He was caught stroganoff

Elephant Jokes More Elephant Jokes

Why do elephants wear green shoes?

So they can sneak across pool tables. Have you ever seen an elephant sneaking across a pool table? Works, doesn't it?

How do you know if there’s an elephant under your bed?

Your head hits the ceiling!

Sale Jokes More Sale Jokes

Where are the groceries?

ME: Bacon was on sale. WIFE: Oh god, what does that mean *sound of dump truck backing into driveway*

How much for the best friend?

Manager : Sir, we've been through this, our cashiers aren't for sale.