Pool Table Jokes

Why do elephants wear green shoes?

So they can sneak across pool tables. Have you ever seen an elephant sneaking across a pool table? Works, doesn't it?

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Why is the pool table green?

If you got your balls kicked around, I think you would be green too.

What is green, fuzzy and very deadly if it falls on you out of a tree?

A pool table.

How do you make a pool table laugh?

Jiggle its balls

How do you know when you're in a true, tough lesbian bar?

Even the pool tables have no balls

How do u get a pool table to laugh?

tickle its balls.

What do you call an Irishman with no arms and no legs on a pool table?

Rick O'Shay

What is the difference between a girl and a pool table?

You have a shot with a pool table.

Why is a pool table green?

Well you'd be green too if someone racked your balls.

How do you know you are in a real lesbian bar?

Not even the pool table has balls

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What do you get when you mix a helicopter and a rhino?

Hell if I know.

How many babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

I don't know... I broke the lightbulb after I threw the first one.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a podiatrist and a drummer?

The podiatrist bucks up your feet.

What's the difference... between a gazpacho bean and a chickpea?

I've never had a gazpacho bean on my face.

Arm Jokes More Arm Jokes

What do you call a guy with no arms and not legs laying on a porch?

Matt

What is the fastest way to get a one-armed blonde out of a tree?

A. Wave at her.

Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

What distance say when velocity fell on top of him?

Ow, this really hertz.

Why is it called an "almond" in the tree but an "amond" when it falls to the ground?

When it falls to the ground, it knocks the 'ell out of it.

Leg Jokes More Leg Jokes

How did the psychiatrist break his leg?

He had a Freudian slip.

What's got two legs, spots and bleeds?

Half a cheetah.

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why'd the seaman cross the road?

Because I wore the wrong sock that day.

What does a grizzly wear under his fur?

Under-bear.

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

Why was the NSA computer programmer late for work?

Because he got Snowden

What should you give a man who has everything?

A. A woman to show him how to work it.

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

Why did the dog's friends send her home from the bar when she started to act strange?

They thought she might have been slipped a woofie.

Why don't dyslexics like the story of King Arthur?

They think it's about the romance and majesty of Camelto.