Spray Jokes

Why did the mexican fire department fail?

They didnt have any Jose to spray the water.

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Why did Vanilla Ice steal a can of hair spray?

Because the label said, "Contents Under Pressure" Got this joke from my brother :D

What do you called being pepper sprayed at UC Davis?

Occupational hazard.

Why did the girl spray her clock?

A: It was full of ticks.

What did the priest say when watering his garden?

Let us spray.

Why don't mexicans have checking accounts?

It's too hard to spray paint your name on the little line.

What have men and spray paint in common?

One squeeze and they're all over you.

How can you tell when Ron Jeremy is finished pumping gas?

He pulls out the nozzle and sprays it all over the car!

What did the veterinarian performing canine reproductive surgery say to the veterinarian with over productive saliva disorder?

Spay it don't spray it.

What do you get if you cross a retard and a graffiti artist?

Someone who spray paints on a chain link fence.

Why did the mexicans fight so hard for the alamo?

They wanted 4 clean walls to spray paint.

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What did the Pink Panther say after he sprayed raid on an anthill?

Dead ant. Dead ant. Dead ant, dead ant, dead ant.*

What did the Skunk say at Church?

Let us spray

What is the one smell you can never get out of the house, no matter what you spray or what incense you burn?

Your grandparents.

Whatever shall we do?

Let us spray!" replied the other.

What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a water hose?

Hare spray.

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What did you just do?

CAT: *bolts for no apparent reason* ME: *bolts in the opposite direction in case she's after both of us*

Why does a golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he gets a hole in one!

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Why do scuba divers fall backwards into the water?

Because if they fell forwards they’d still be in the boat.

Where is the water main?

so I turned on the tap & said, "Right here, main."

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What did a police officer write in the criminal report, when they found a homey from the bottom of a lake, wrapped in 200 kg's of metal chains?

Offender stole more than he could carry by swimming

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A zebra.

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What will santa bring your fish this christmas?

A scale letrix!

What is the best way to avoid having your flight bombed?

Bring your own bomb! Cause what are the odds that there are **two** bombs on the same plane

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I was gonna tell you a joke about UDP...

...but you might not get it.

What's the best language for jokes?

Punjabi.

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What do you call a girl who's preventing you from reaching your goal?

A keeper

Why do prison guards use Proactive all the time?

So they can prevent breakouts.

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Why did Vanilla Ice steal a can of hair spray?

Because the label said, "Contents Under Pressure" Got this joke from my brother :D

Why is Vanilla Ice scratching his head?

Lice. Lice, maybe.

Hispanic Attack Jokes More Hispanic Attack Jokes

Why does the Mexican guy take xanax?

For hispanic attacks Edit: Happy Cinco de Mayo

Why did the Mexican take Xanax?

For Hispanic attacks.