E.T. Jokes

What's E.T. short for?

Because he has wee legs

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What's the difference between E.T and illegal immigrants?

E.T actually learned English and wanted to go home.

How are E.T. and a Mexican immigrant the same?

They both steal your bike.

What's the difference between a refugee and E.T?

E.T learned English and wanted to go home.

Why are E.T.'s eyes so big?

He saw the phone bill.

What's E.T. Stand for?

Extra testicle

What is E.T. short for?

So he can fit on a spaceship.

What did E.T.'s mother say when E.T. got home?

Where on Earth have you been??!!" **Thank you, I'll be here all night... Edit: Thanks for da love Dr. Jones!

What's the difference between a man and E.T.?

E.T. phoned home.

What's E.T short for?

Because he's got little legs. But seriously, what does ET stand for Because he can't sit down.

What does E.T stand for?

Because he hasn't got a chair!..... sorry.

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What's the difference between E.T. and a Mexican?

E.T. learned English and went home.

What does E.T. stand for?

Freedom of speech

What do you call an alien with three balls?

E.T. the extra testicle.

Whats E.T.'s first name?

Yodela

What's the different between E.T. and a refugee?

E.T. learned English and wanted to go home

What did E.T.'s mother say to him when he got home?

What did E.T.'s mother say to him when he got home WHERE ON EARTH HAVE YOU BEEN Saddest joke ever.

What’s E.T. short for?

He’s only got little legs.

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What's the difference between a happy person and ET?

A happy person has a light heart and ET has a heart light

Why did the alien phone home on his mobile?

Because it was so ET !

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What did Jesus say to Melchior?

Thanks for the gold, kind stranger!

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A sub woofer. Thank you & God Bless

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What does E.T. stand for?

Freedom of speech

How do you convey body language?

With your figure of speech

Bike Jokes More Bike Jokes

Why do bikes have kick-stands?

A: Because they're two-tired.

Why did the blonde run with the bike?

A: It was going too fast for her to get on.

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Where the hell are you going with those balloons?

4yr: I need to wee! Me: With balloons ! 4yr: Its so much fun to wee with balloons

What's E.T. short for?

Because he has wee legs

Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

What if Stephen hawking was the real slim shady?

but we would never know because he couldn't stand up

Why do vampires hate Texas Roadhouse?

They can not stand stakes!

Chair Jokes More Chair Jokes

What did the woodworm say to the chair ?

It's been nice gnawing you !

How do you get 4 girls to sit on one chair?

You flip it upside down.

Phone Bill Jokes More Phone Bill Jokes

Why are E.T.'s eyes so big?

He saw the phone bill.

Why couldn't the baby camel surf the Internet?

Because whenever his parents saw their phone bill they got the hump.