Fungus Jokes

How much room is needed for fungi to grow?

As mushroom as possible

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Why did the mushroom go to the party?

Because he was a fungi

What did one mushroom say to the other?

You're a fungi to be with

Why do mycologists have such a good time?

Because they hang around the fungi.

Why is the mushroom so popular?

Because he's such a fungi.

Why is the fungus such a hypocrite?

because it doesn't have mushroom to talk.

Why did everyone wanted to hang out with the mushroom?

Because he was a fungi

Which country has the most number of bacteria, viruses, fungus and other micro-organisms?

GerMany

What did the mushroom say on his dating profile?

I'm a fungi!

Why don't people hang out with the mushroom?

He isn't a fungi.

What did the mushroom put in his bio for the online dating service?

Im a fungi

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Why not man?

I really am a FunGi."

What did the baker say about her co-worker who never sleeps and always smells funky?

At yeast he's a fungi.

Why did a girl leave his boyfriend for a mushroom?

because he wasn't a fungi!

What do you call a mushroom that picks up the bar tab?

A FUNGI to be with!

Why does the mushroom have a lot of friends?

He's a fungi

Why did Mario always bring Toad to parties?

Toad was a fungi.

What do you call a mushroom with a 12 in stem?

A fungi to hang out with

Why'd the mushroom go to the party?

Cause he's a fungi! Why'd the fungi leave the party Cause there wasn't mushroom!

Why did the scientist regret naming the organism "Fungus"?

Because after they hung out Gus was actually a pretty boring guy.

Why did the mushroom have so many friends?

He was a fungi.

Why did the mushroom get invited to the party?

Because he was a fungi.

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Which country has the most number of bacteria, viruses, fungus and other micro-organisms?

GerMany

Why did the scientist regret naming the organism "Fungus"?

Because after they hung out Gus was actually a pretty boring guy.

Micro Jokes More Micro Jokes

What do you call it when two amoebas say hi?

A micro-transaction.

How did Micro-soft get it's name?

Because Bill Gates has a 3.5 inch floppy

Country Jokes More Country Jokes

What country are you most likely to get a disease?

GERMany.

Which country has many spaces to put your car in?

Park-istan!

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

What did Pink Panther say when he stepped on Ant?

Nothing, Pink Panther doesn't talk!

What do you mean he's your half son?

What do you mean what do I mean?" replied the man. He went on to explain "My son has half my genes, that makes him my half-son." The woman he was talking to decided he was crazy and without replying walked past him. She looked back and noticed his neck was red, after all it was a sunny day.

Virus Jokes More Virus Jokes

Why didn't the other viruses hang out with The Common Cold?

Because he is a bad influenza

Which country has the most number of bacteria, viruses, fungus and other micro-organisms?

GerMany

Germany Jokes More Germany Jokes

What do you think is the biggest problem in Germany?

Uncertainty or indifference ' He answered: I don't know and I don't care!'

What was the most popular TV show in Ancient Rome and Germany in early AD?

Whose Rhine Is It Anyway?

Hang Jokes More Hang Jokes

Why did the blonde go to church?

B/c she heard there was a guy hung like this(https://riverchurchtelford.files.wordpress.com/2013/03/jesus.jpg)

What do you do when your suicidal friend asks for a hi-five?

You leave him hanging....

Bacteria Jokes More Bacteria Jokes

Why did the bacteria cross the microscope?

To get to the other slide

What do you call an egocentric strain of bacteria found in a Chipotle burrito?

ME-coli