Cousin Jokes

What did the two rednecks say after breaking up?

Let's just be cousins.

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What's faster than a black man running with a tv?

His cousin with the DVD player

What did the redneck say to his ex?

Can we still be cousins?"

What's the worst hereditary disease?

Cousins

What is the difference between a Texan and a redneck?

Texans tend to ride horses whereas rednecks ride their cousins. -American Sniper

Why does a redneck find his cousin more attractive than a stranger?

Because it's all relative.

Why did Albert Einstein marry his cousin?

Because she was his relative

How did Einstein prove you can break the law of relativity?

He married his cousin.

What does the south call friends with benefits?

Cousins.....

What Does A Redneck Call It When He Visits His Cousin Outside His Town?

Entering the friend zone.

What do you get when you mix chocolate milk and cocaine?

Ovalsheen. Credit goes to my cousin on this one.

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What do two rednecks say to each other after a break up?

Let's go back to being cousins.

Why did Einstein marry his cousin?

It's all relative.

How many hillbillies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

2. A man, his wife, and his cousin

What mom loves... Son: Mom, why is my cousin's name rose?

Mom: Well son, your aunt really loves flowers! Son: Mom, what do you love Mom: Richard, stop asking so many questions!

What music you into?

Date: I love hip hop Me: Yeah me too thinking of something to say to impress her Me: Soup Dogg is my cousin

What dog is a cousin to the Dalmatian?

A spot-weiler!

What does non-alcoholic beer and going down on you cousin have in common?

Sure they taste the same, but it just ain't right.

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Dvd Player Jokes More Dvd Player Jokes

What's faster than a black man with your TV?

His son with your DVD player! I mean no racism in this joke*

What's faster than a black man running with a tv?

His cousin with the DVD player

Dracula Jokes More Dracula Jokes

What did Dracula say at the Christmas party ?

Fancy a bite

What do you call Dracula when he goes swimming?

Aqua-Vlad

Count Jokes More Count Jokes

How does the farmer count up his cows?

with a cowculator.

Why was the girl at starbucks counting her coins in 3's?

Because white girls cant even

Stranger Jokes More Stranger Jokes

Why does a redneck find his cousin more attractive than a stranger?

Because it's all relative.

What's the speed limit in this hick town?

Native: We don't have one. You strangers can't get out of here fast enough for us.

7 Year Old Cousin Jokes More 7 Year Old Cousin Jokes

Why do horses make terrible congressmen?

Because they can only say "neigh!" I wish this was a joke made up by my 7 year old cousin, but she's imaginary.

What kind of farm has lots of books but no livestock?

Barns and no-bulls. (This joke was made up by my 7 year-old cousin.)

Break Jokes More Break Jokes

What's that, turkey?

GOBBLE GOBBLE Timmy fell in a well GOBBLE GOBBLE breaks turkey's neck no time for your riddles, in the oven you go

What did the mouse say when his friend broke his front teeth?

Hard cheese.

Relative Jokes More Relative Jokes

How does a viola greet a relative?

Cello!

Why did Albert Einstein marry his cousin?

Because she was his relative

Marry Jokes More Marry Jokes

Why couldn't the watermelon get married in Vegas?

Because his fiancee is a cantaloupe!

Why don't married men live as long as single men?

They don't want to!