Cousin Jokes

What did the two rednecks say after breaking up?

Let's just be cousins.

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What's faster than a black man running with a tv?

His cousin with the DVD player

What did the redneck say to his ex?

Can we still be cousins?"

What's the worst hereditary disease?

Cousins

What is the difference between a Texan and a redneck?

Texans tend to ride horses whereas rednecks ride their cousins. -American Sniper

Why does a redneck find his cousin more attractive than a stranger?

Because it's all relative.

Why did Albert Einstein marry his cousin?

Because she was his relative

How did Einstein prove you can break the law of relativity?

He married his cousin.

What does the south call friends with benefits?

Cousins.....

What Does A Redneck Call It When He Visits His Cousin Outside His Town?

Entering the friend zone.

What do you get when you mix chocolate milk and cocaine?

Ovalsheen. Credit goes to my cousin on this one.

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What do two rednecks say to each other after a break up?

Let's go back to being cousins.

Why did Einstein marry his cousin?

It's all relative.

How many hillbillies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

2. A man, his wife, and his cousin

What mom loves... Son: Mom, why is my cousin's name rose?

Mom: Well son, your aunt really loves flowers! Son: Mom, what do you love Mom: Richard, stop asking so many questions!

What music you into?

Date: I love hip hop Me: Yeah me too thinking of something to say to impress her Me: Soup Dogg is my cousin

What dog is a cousin to the Dalmatian?

A spot-weiler!

What does non-alcoholic beer and going down on you cousin have in common?

Sure they taste the same, but it just ain't right.

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How did the farmer find his girlfriend?

He tractor!

What musical instrument can be found in nearly every Bathroom?

A tuba toothpaste.

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What did Einstein's dad say when he published his theory of relativity?

Damn, son. It's about time!

How did Einstein prove you can break the law of relativity?

He married his cousin.

Farm Jokes More Farm Jokes

What does the horse call the pigs on his farm?

Neigh-boars.

What do you call a farm full of blacks?

Antique farm equipment.

Tv Jokes More Tv Jokes

Where do tv's go on vacation?

To remote Islands

What do you call Dracula's retarded cousin?

Countdown This was a joke I heard on TV some time ago ... Thought it was worth a share.

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What kind of music do phones love to hear?

A symphony

What is the opposite of Christopher Reeve?

Sorry if you've heard this) Christopher Walken

Book Jokes More Book Jokes

How did the potato get back from the party?

It booked a Tuber.

Whats the most unlikely line to read in the bible ?

The characters in this book are entirely fictional.

Marry Jokes More Marry Jokes

Why can't Stevie Wonder see his mates?

Because he's married.

Why is the bride always sad on her wedding day?

Because she doesn't get to marry the best man.

Tend Jokes More Tend Jokes

What do monks, rabbis, and Mormon priests have in common with brains?

The all tend to be found enclosed within temples.

What did the botanist say to the plant he was tired of tending to?

Grow away.