Raisin Jokes

Why did Jesus drink wine at the last supper?

Because in 3 days, he would be a raisin

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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Coffee Mug

Why are oatmeal cookies better?

No raisin

Where are the raisins today?

A student used to give his teacher some raisins everyday. He kept giving them for 3 months straight. Then one day he did not give raisins to his teacher. And his teacher asked him "Where are the raisins today?", and the boy said "My rabbit died."

Why didn't the Christmas Cake go to the dance?

He had his raisins...

What did the raisin see when she came home early from work?

Her husband on a date.

Why did the Raisin take a Prune to the Prom?

Because he couldn't find a Date!

How did the raisin have fun at the movies?

It took a date....

Where can you find information about raisins that commit adultery?

Currant Affairs

How many raisins do I have to add to this bag of M&Ms before it qualifies as trail mix?

One I say one.

Why did the raisin take the prune to the new year's ball?

Because he couldn't find a date!

What do you call a bunch of black kids playing in leaves?

Raisin bran

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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Coffee Mug

What do you call a spider with no legs?

A raisin

What are you gonna argue about with your family this Thanksgiving?

1. Minimum wage 2. Police reform 3. Why are there raisins in this, Louise

Why did the raisin go out with a prune?

He couldn't get a date!

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Baker Jokes More Baker Jokes

What did the baker say when he saw the beautiful woman?

I think I'm in loaf." Ba dum, tss.

What did the baker say about her co-worker who never sleeps and always smells funky?

At yeast he's a fungi.

Commit Jokes More Commit Jokes

How do you figure out if Will Smith committed a crime?

Dust for Fresh Prints! (i this version better than any snowstorm b.s.)

Whats the difference between american women and middle eastern women?

American women get stoned before they commit adultery..

Bag Jokes More Bag Jokes

What do you have when you got a bag of weed and a bottle of Jack Daniel's?

Jackpot!

Why do Kenyans always win marathons?

At the end, they get a bag of chips and a Coke. -My dad told me this joke when we went to a race-

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

How did Jesus like his chicken?

Crucifried

What are your plans for Easter?

Husband: Same as Jesus.. Wife: What do you mean Husband:I will disappear on Friday and reappear on Monday!!

Fun Jokes More Fun Jokes

What do you call a man with a spade on his head?

Doug Got a set of tweezers as the toy as well. Hours of fun right there.

What do turtles do for fun?

Play hide and shell.

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

Why didnt the witch have any children?

Because her husband had a hollow weenie

What does a Russian woman say to stop her husband from abusing her?

Vladislov, baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more... I'm sorry..

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What's the difference between white students and black students?

Black students bring the gun to school. White kids use it at school.

Why did the blonde quit using the pill?

Because it kept falling out.

Boy Jokes More Boy Jokes

Why did the boy put candles on the toilet?

He wanted to have a birthday potty!

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas?

I don't know, he hasn't opened his presents yet.