W Jokes

What do you call a word with two W's and one K?

Awkward.

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What's a word that starts with "u" and ends with "w"?

Cloning.

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory?

For throwing out all the w's.

Why did the blond get fired from the M&M factory?

Because she kept throwing out all the W's

What's the capital of Wisconsin?

W

Why was the blonde fired from the M&M factory?

She threw out all the W's.

Why did the blonde girl get fired from the M&M factory?

She kept throwing away all the W's.

Why did the worker at the M&M factory get fired?

he threw out the W's

What does a guy who can predict the lottery numbers 99% of the time have in common with the letters C, D, G, H, J, K, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, and Z?

They're not infallible

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&ampM factory?

She threw away all of the W's.

What would you like?

ME:What would YOU like W:Excuse me M:No one ever asks you, do they W:*tearing up* No.. they don't. Thank you.

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Why did the blonde get thrown out of the M & M factory?

A. She kept throwing out all the W's.

Why did the blonde girl get fired from the M&ampM factory?

She kept throwing away all the W's.

Why did the worker at the M&ampM factory get fired?

he threw out the W's

How do you make a witch scratch?

Remove the w

How do you do it w/ 4 kids?

Hubs: With the door locked. Me: She means how do we manage...but yeah.

How do you spell "we" with two letters without using the letters W and E?

U and I.

What's this payment?

Me: we're sponsoring a panda! W: so is this monthly M: No, it's just for the one skydive

How can you make a witch itch?

Take away her "W."

Why did the blond get fired from the M&ampM factory?

Because she kept throwing out all the W's

How is everything?

ME: Soul crushing and void of meaning W: I meant your meal M: Soul crushing, void of meaning, and needs salt

What starts with "W" and ends with "ife"?

Nevermind, this riddle is too easy.

What are you gonna do today?

Me: Shower. W: ...what else M: Make a new iTunes playlist. W: Wow. M: Might not have time for a shower.

Whatya doin?

Me: I fixed the toilet so I'm adding Potty Fixer to my resume W: You mean Plumber M: DO I LOOK LIKE A HOUSE SCIENTIST

Why was the blonde fired from the M&ampM factory?

She threw out all the W's.

Who is the prettiest of my friends?

Me: your mother, why W: Stop acting like you're 12. M: (thinking) I dodged that bullet again.

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Army Jokes More Army Jokes

What do you call a group of pillaging Huns?

An army of Hun-dread.

What do you call an army of gorilla soldiers?

Boko Harambe.

2 Jokes More 2 Jokes

Why are the Harry Potter films unrealisitc?

A: A ginger kid has 2 friends!

Who else does this?

1. wets toothbrush 2. puts toothpaste on toothbrush 3. wets toothbrush again 4. does backflip on to huge pile of money

Cud Jokes More Cud Jokes

What do you call explosive cow vomit?

A cud missle!

Wheree did the king keep his armies?

IN HIS SLEEVIES LOL xp cuz it's like armies like babi talk for arms instead of an armie like a bunch of dudes w/ issues w/ theer masculinity np, glad i cud explain dis 2 u

Thank Jokes More Thank Jokes

Why do Russians always wear track suits?

Because they are always RUSSIAN to places. thanks

What did the man in the wheelchair say when he returned the hat he borrowed?

Thanks for the handy cap.

M Jokes More M Jokes

What did the rock say to the other rock?

Im hard

Why couldn't The Doctor play baseball?

They couldn't figure out Who was on first (Sorry, if this has been submitted before, im new here)

Start Jokes More Start Jokes

What is the difference between my ex-girlfriend and a beer?

One is pale, bitter and starts off with lots of head and the other one is a beer.

How do you build a flea circus?

You have to start from scratch.

Word Jokes More Word Jokes

What has one "n", two "g"s, an "i", "e", and an "r" and you can only say this word when you belong to this group?

ginger

What word begins with "N" and ends in "R" that I wouldn't want to call a black guy?

Neighbor.

Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

Who is the coolest guy in a hospital. The ultra sound guy. Whos the coolest when he is off?

The hip replacement guy. /dad

What did the cow say when she got hit by a car?

Moo." What did the cow saw when she fell into a ditch? "Moo." What did the cow say when she fell onto the electric fence? "Moo." What did the cow say when she got hit by a train? "Why does everything always happen to meeee?" Protip: My dad wrote this joke for me when I was six.