Army Jokes

IN HIS SLEEVIES LOL xp cuz it's like armies like babi talk for arms instead of an armie like a bunch of dudes w/ issues w/ theer masculinity np, glad i cud explain dis 2 u

Where do ants keep their armies?

in their sleevies

Why do parents send their toddlers to the army for daycare?

Because they're sending them to the infantry!

What do you call an army of lesbians?

Militia Etheridge

Where does the army keep fish?

In a tank.

What do you call 100,000 Frenchmen with their hands up?

The Army.

How far away is the US Army's website?

Just a few klicks away.

How many volunteers do we have for the army?

384 sir" "okay round them up" "400 sir"

What do you call an army of gorilla soldiers?

Boko Harambe.

What does the Army call it's Muslim infantry units with vehicles?

Mecca-nized infantry.

Why do you want to participate in this guerrilla war?

Me: picturing myself leading an army of gorillas into battle "Independence."

Where did Napoleon keep his armies?

IN HIS SLEEVIES! Best used with little kids, or followed by maniacal laughter.

Why did King Kong join the army?

To learn about gorilla warfare.

What do you call a group of pillaging Huns?

An army of Hun-dread.

How are tigers like sergeants in the army ?

They both wear stripes !

Why are there no guys named William serving in the army?

Because they dislike the phrase "Fire at Will"

What do you get if you cross a centipede and a chicken ?

Enough drumsticks to feed an army !

What did they tell the burger who enlisted in the Army?

You've got no beef soldier!

Why did the carpenter join the army?

Because he wanted to be a Drill Sergeant

What do you call a dentist in the army ?

A drill sergeant !

What military branch has the largest biceps?

The Army.

What do you call 1000 soldiers with no legs?

An army.

What is an army of blue babies on horseback called?

A navy infantry cavalry

Why did the pig join the Army?

He heard the food was a mess.

Where do kings keep there armies?

In their sleevies.

Why did the army send so many women with PMS to the Persian Gulf?

They fought like animals and retained water for 4 days.

Where does a shoulder work?

In the army.

Why did Napoleon wear sleeves?

For his armies

What do you call corn that joins the army?

Kernel.

Where does Napoleon keep his armies?

In his sleevies.

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Armor Jokes More Armor Jokes

What do you call an Asian in a tank?

A chink in the armor.

What was wrong with Genghis Khan's new suit?

There was a chink in his armor.

Corn Jokes More Corn Jokes

How do you prepare corn like Sean Connery?

Shuck it long, and shuck it hard.

Who is the supreme religious leader of the corns?

Pope corn!

Infantry Jokes More Infantry Jokes

What do you call a squadron of baby soldiers?

Infantry.

What do you get if you cross a baby with soldiers ?

Infantry !

Separate Jokes More Separate Jokes

What river separates China and India?

Answer: the Fraser River (which separates Richmond and Surrey)

How does it feel to have your head separated from your body?

It tears your apart.

Explain Jokes More Explain Jokes

Who laughs the last?

The one who you have to explain the joke to.

How does Mulan's boyfriend explain himself when she caught him smoking pot?

Shanghai

Sleevie Jokes More Sleevie Jokes

Where did Julius Caesar keep his armies?

In his sleevies.

Where are the king's armies?

Up his sleevies."

President Jokes More President Jokes

What does it take to be a president?

Nothing

Who is the president of the trees?

BarkOak Palma

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What did the angry dough ball say to the other dough ball?

You trying to get a rise out of me! Came up with while I was making pizza.

Why didnt the asian block a punch coming to his face?

He couldn't see it coming