Moses Jokes

How does Moses makes his coffee?

Hebrews it.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
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Coffee Mug

How does Moses make his tea?

Hebrews it. I'm serious! That Israeli how he does it!

How does Moses get his tea ready?

Hebrews

Why couldn't Moses believe his mother sent him away in a basket?

Because he was in de-nile

How did Moses feel after falling for a craigslist scam?

Egypt.

What's Mohammed, Moses and Noah's favourite dessert?

Propheteroles

Why does Woody Harrelson's wife call him Moses?

Because he Ramparts the red sea each month

How did Moses make his tea in the morning?

Hebrewed it.

How does Moses get his coffee?

He buys it from Starbucks...

Why did Moses part his hair?

To make a path for the Israelice.

What does Moses do when he wants a beer?

He brews!

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug
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Coffee Mug

How did Moses part the Red Sea?

He used a Sea-saw.

How did Moses make his coffee?

Hebrewed it.

How does Moses make beer?

Hebrews!

Why doesn't Moses buy beer?

He brews it.

Why did Moses wander in the desert for 40 years?

A: Even then men wouldn't ask for directions!

Why did Muhammad hire Moses to help with his start-up?

He wanted to double his prophets.

What did Moses say when he wanted to see through his door?

Let my peephole grow!

What did Moses say when Isaiah told him the levy had burst?

God Dam It!

How did Moses make his tea?

Hebrewed it

Why couldn't Moses adopt a kitten from the animal shelter?

Because the shelter was non prophet.

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How did Moses feel after falling for a craigslist scam?

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What is enjoyed if it is wanted and hated if its not?

Democracy

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A. Because he wanted to be a smarty

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Why did Moses wander in the desert for 40 years?

A: Even then men wouldn't ask for directions!

What's the difference between Reddit CEO Ellen Pao, and Yoko Ono?

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What did the mama pig say when junior pig bought a basket of wormy apples?

Don't tell the farmer. He might charge us extra."

Why couldn't Moses believe his mother sent him away in a basket?

Because he was in de-nile

Tea Jokes More Tea Jokes

What kind of tea do wealthy people own?

Proper-Tea

Why did so many people support the colonist protest of tea?

Cause everyone wanted'a "boo" tea!

Da Nile Jokes More Da Nile Jokes

What do you call a an Egyptian crocodile who swears they live in Florida?

In da-Nile

Why was drug addicted Moses upset when he was floating down a river?

because he was in Da-Nile

Path Jokes More Path Jokes

Why is their always lightning in France?

Obviously, since lightning takes the path of least resistance.

Why does lightning only strike the French?

Because it follows the path of least resistance

Brew Jokes More Brew Jokes

What does Captain Falcon say when he goes to Starbucks?

Show me your brews!"

What do you call a man that brews beer?

A Hebrew.