Stamp Jokes

What did the stamp say to the envelope?

Stick with me man... We'll go places. Peace. Hmath out.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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How can you tell when a fax has been sent by a blonde?

When there's a stamp on it.

Why are so many Italian men named Tony?

When they ship them over from the Old Country, they stamp "To N.Y." on them...

What is the difference between a baby and a stamp?

I don't have a stamp collection.

Why do ducks have flat feet?

So they can stamp out fires. Why do elephants have flat feet? So they can stamp out flaming ducks.

Why are a lot of Italians named Tony?

Because as they got on the boat to leave Italy, they were stamped on the head, "TO NY".

Why do elephants have big flat feet?

To stamp out flaming ducks.

Why do ducks have big flat feet?

A: To stamp out forest fires.

Why couldn't prehistoric man send birthday cards?

The stamps kept falling off the rocks!

What did the stamp say to the envelope on Valentine's Day?

I'm stuck on you!"

What goes around the world yet stays in the corner?

Stamp

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Why did the mother cat put stamps on her kittens?

A: Because she wanted to mail a litter.

Why hang Wanted posters in the post office?

We're not crime-fighting crusaders. We're buying stamps.

What travels around the world but stays in one corner?

A stamp.

Why do frogs have webbed feet ?

To stamp out forest fires !

Why did people stop printing stamps with photo of Pamela Anderson?

Banta: Because people started licking the wrong side of it for pasting them on the envelopes..

Why did the boy jump up and down on the letter?

He heard that you have to stamp letters or the post office won't send them.

Why do ducks have webbed feet ?

To stamp out forest fires !

Why don't you stamp e-mails?

Because your foot would go right through the computer screen!

What goes all around the world but stays in one corner the entire time?

Stamps!

What did they stamp on the Asian baby as he came out of his mother's womb?

Made in Va-China.

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What do you call an Italian man with Parkinson's?

A stutterer.

What do you call an Italian man without arms?

A mute. Sorry if repost.

Peace Jokes More Peace Jokes

What did the neckbeard say while giving the eulogy for his extremely flatulent friend?

Rip in peace

What did the stamp say to the envelope?

Stick with me man... We'll go places. Peace. Hmath out.

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What's the difference between a dead cat and a dead lawyer on the road?

The dead cat has skid marks around it.

What is the difference between a philanthropist and Nicki Minaj?

A philanthropist likes to impress people with his larg**esse**! :-P

Italy Jokes More Italy Jokes

What is the national bird of Italy?

A: The fly.

Who wins?

Neither. France surrenders and Italy switches sides.

Big Flat Foot Jokes More Big Flat Foot Jokes

Why do elephants have big flat feet?

To stamp out flaming ducks.

Why do ducks have big flat feet?

A: To stamp out forest fires.

Valentine Day Jokes More Valentine Day Jokes

What happened when the two lovers were watching a scary movie in a year when Valentine's day happened to fall on Friday the 13th?

Oh wait, nevermind. I'm an idiot...*

Why is Valentine's Day the best day for a celebration?

Because you can really party hearty!

Send Jokes More Send Jokes

What four letter word has made the biggest impact in the modern world?

Send.

How do wasps send messages?

By bee-mail.

Elephant Jokes More Elephant Jokes

What do elephants say as a compliment ?

You look elephantastic !

Why did the elephant paint his balls green?

Answer: to hide in avocado trees.. How did Tarzan die? Answer: Picking avocados