Un Jokes

Where does Napoleon live/Ou Napolon habite-t-il?

Dans un bon-apartement.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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How do you know that you're a peaceful country?

When you realize that you can't spell country without UN.

What's the difference between a virgin and a lightbulb?

You can un-screw a lightbulb.

Who won?

One two three' cat, because 'Un deux trois' cat sank.

What do you call it when three french cats get into a boat only meant for two?

Un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq!

What's the difference between Gene Simmons and Richard Simmons?

One porks women the other un-porks them.

Why did the French Hen give up her job?

One day she'd just had un uf.

Why do the French make omelettes with only one egg?

Because in France one egg is un oeuf.

Why did the Frenchman not want two eggs?

Because one egg is un oeuf.

What do you call a vegetable that always stays outside?

An un-in.

How does a orphan change a light bulb?

They grab the stack of un-signed adoption papers, stand on top of them, then proceed to change the light bulb.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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Which cat made it across?

The second cat because un deux trois cat sank.

Why was the frog down in the mouth ?

He was un hoppy !

How many eggs do the French use in their omelettes?

Just one, because in France one egg is un oeuf.

How many French eggs do you need?

One egg is un oeuf.

Why do you only need one egg in France?

Because one egg is un oeuf.

Which fairy tale character would be most likely to be shot by the police?

An un-armed gingerbread man

Why did the Frenchman not want two eggs for breakfast?

Because one egg is un oeuf.

Why do French people only have one egg at breakfast?

Because one egg is un oeuf.

What's the difference between the UN and ISIS?

The pension package.

Which cat won the race?

A: The English cat. Un deux trois cat sank.

What did Jesus say when they un-nailed his hands from the cross?

THE FEET, THE FEET, THE FEET!!!

Why do the French only have one egg for breakfast?

Because one egg is un oeuf.

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60 Jokes More 60 Jokes

What do you call an unfriendly American from the 60's?

An anti-socialist

What happens when a pirate turns 60?

He joins AARP

Boat Jokes More Boat Jokes

Where do boats go when they're sick?

The Doc

Why are a lot of Italians named Tony?

Because as they got on the boat to leave Italy, they were stamped on the head, "TO NY".

Dan Jokes More Dan Jokes

Why did little Dan dropped his ice cream?

He was hit by a buss

Where does Napoleon live/Ou Napolon habite-t-il?

Dans un bon-apartement.

Ellen Pao Jokes More Ellen Pao Jokes

What does apathy sound like?

I'm Ellen Pao, AMA

Whos there Ellen Ellen who?

Ellen Pao Oh k lol stay out.

Cat Jokes More Cat Jokes

What do you call a cat who takes a shortcut in a race?

A Cheetah.

Why did the man put a dead tiger on his lawn?

To scare off Cat burglars!

Virgin Jokes More Virgin Jokes

Why was Mary Jane not a virgin?

Her mother leaves.

What do you call a virgin in West Virginia?

An only child....

Spell Jokes More Spell Jokes

How do you spell Canda?

C,eh,N,eh,D,eh

Why a pirate could not spell iris?

He had only one 'i'

North Korea Jokes More North Korea Jokes

What's the leader of north korea's wife wear when she's not in the mood?

a Kimono

Why is North Korea so polluted?

They have supreme litter.