Bull Jokes

What do you call a guy who stands under a bull?

Understandabull

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What kind of farm has lots of books but no livestock?

Barns and no-bulls. (This joke was made up by my 7 year-old cousin.)

What do you call it when the bull impales the bullfighter?

A hole in Juan!

What happens when a bull and a horse go to a bar?

They get BUCKED up!

What did the farmer say when he found dynamite in one of his cows?

This is a bomb in a bull.

Why did the cow slap the bull?

He didn't play well with udders.

What do you call empathetic bovine?

understand bull

What do bulls do math with?

A cow-culator! (Cue groans)

What's the difference between a bull and a cow?

A bull smiles when you milk it.

What do you call a cow with one udder?

A bull.

How does a bull stay warm on a bitterly cold day?

A: He goes into the barn and slips into a nice warm Jersey.

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What does a bull do to stay warm on a cold day?

It goes into a barn and slips into a nice warm Jersey.

What do you call it when one bull spies on another bull?

A steak-out!

Who's there ! Bull ! Bull who ?

Bull the chain when your done !

What do bulls do for fun?

Play with others.

What's a moo hoo for a stuffed steer?

A full bull!

How does a bull stay warm on a bitterly cold day in January?

He goes into the barn and slips into a warm Jersey.

How do bulls drive their cars?

They steer them!

Why was the bull popular with all the cows?

Because he was smooooooooth

How do you stop a bull from charging?

Take away his credit card.

What should you do when a bull charges you?

Pay him

What do you call a matador who lost to the bull?

A mat'o'gore.

Why did the farmer fence in the bull?

The farmer had too much of a steak in him to let him go!

Where did the bull carry his stock-market report?

In his beef case!

What did the bull say to the green eyed cow?

I can't get pasteurize.

What would you do if a bull charged you?

Mary: I'd pay whatever it charged.

What's the difference between cows and bulls?

It takes longer to milk the bull.

What does a bull do on a bitter cold winter day?

A: He goes into the barn and slips inside a warm Jersey

What do you call a bull that's sent overseas by boat?

Shipped beef!

What do you call a bull that runs into a threshing machine?

Hamburger!

What's the difference between a bull and a Samsung Note 7?

I'm not scared when the bull charges

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What do guys like but are afraid of?

Girls

How do you teach a girl math?

Subtract her clothes, divide her legs, give her a square root and watch her multiply.

Charge Jokes More Charge Jokes

What did the failing kidney say to the healthy one?

Urine charge now.

Why did the photographer get arrested?

He was charged with shooting kids and framing the parents.

Kind Jokes More Kind Jokes

What kind of mint is the hardest to swallow?

Abandonment.

What kind of footwear do Whitewalkers use?

The Hodor-eliminating kind.

Hole Jokes More Hole Jokes

What did the donut say to the loaf of bread?

If I had as much dough as you, I wouldn't be hanging around this hole!

Why did the guy cut a hole in his carpet?

He wanted to watch the floor show. And why did he cover it back up ...He realized that he didn't want to watch the "hole" show.

Farm Jokes More Farm Jokes

What do you call a farm full of blacks?

Antique farm equipment.

What did one cop say to the other cop while investigating a crime scene at a farm?

A rooster!

Cow Jokes More Cow Jokes

What do you get if you cross a cow with a tension headache?

A bad mood!

Why did the milking stool only have three legs?

Because the cow has the udder

Milk Jokes More Milk Jokes

What do you get from a bee that has an udder?

ANSWER: Milk and honey.

What do you get if you cross a cow with an octopus ?

A cow that can milk itself !

Second Jokes More Second Jokes

Who will take the second shot in this snooker game?

Find out after the break.

What is your first wish?

Joe: I want to be rich. Genie: Granted. What is your second wish Rich: I want lots of money.