Bump Jokes

What does a barcode say if he bumps into another barcode?

SKU me

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Coffee Mug

Why did the bus driver drop his coffee?

Because he hit a bump in the road. What was the bump in the road? Little Timmy.

What did the grocery clerk say when he bumped his head when he was in the freezer?

Nothing, he was knocked out .

What did the tectonic plate say when it bumped into another?

Sorry, my fault.

Why did the giraffe cross the highway?

Because he bumped his head on the low-way! I guess we're doing 4 year old's jokes today :)

What did the fish say when it bumped its head?

Dam.

What sounds like a robot and bumps into tables?

Stephen Hawking.

What happens when two oxen bump into each other?

You have an oxident.

Why do they call them "country bumpkins"?

Because in the country, you bump your kin!

What did the dolphin say to the whale when he bumped into him?

A: I didn't do it on porpoise.

What's the difference between falling 2 ft and 200 ft?

200 ft: Aaaaaaaaa, bump 2 ft: Bump, aaaaaaaaa (Yes, it's an old, really old joke. Surprisingly haven't seen it here, yet.)

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Coffee Mug

Why did the dog have a gleam in his eye?

Someone bumped his elbow while he was brushing his teeth.

What was the Italian hot tub that was so small it's occupants always bumped into each other called?

Ja-scusi.

What did the turkey say when he accidentally bumped into the president?

Pardon me.

What did the tectonic plate say to the other tectonic plate when he bumped into the him?

Sorry, my fault.

Why was the school principal not pleased when he bumped into an old friend ?

They were both driving their cars at the time !

Why does Hillary keep bumping into people at the White House?

So she can be pardoned.

What did Hillary say when she bumped into Donald after the election?

Pardon me"

What did the man say when he accidentally bumped into the astronaut?

I Apollo-gize"

How do Polish dogs get bumps on their heads?

Chasing parked cars.

How did the explorer react when the which doctor turned him into a miniature ballsack?

He was a little testie! Bump dump pshhh!

This joke may have profanity.

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Highway Jokes More Highway Jokes

What did the guy on LSD say while driving on the highway?

Woah, the traffic is moving.

What noise does a cat make going down the highway ?

Miaooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooow !

Scream Jokes More Scream Jokes

What is a vampire's favourite soup ?

Scream of mushroom !

What's brown and screams?

Stevie Wonder answering the iron

4 Year Old Jokes More 4 Year Old Jokes

What's "saying grace?

Me: It's when we thank the one who provided our food. 4-year-old: We thank the microwave

How do you greet the cold horse across the fence?

Howdy Neigh - Brr Made up by my 4 year old son.

Drop Jokes More Drop Jokes

What is the worst thing about dating a Japanese girl?

You have to drop da bomb on her twice

What is Kathy Griffin's screen saver?

Celebrity names dropping.

Hit Jokes More Hit Jokes

Who writes hit musicals on the Internet?

Andrew Lloyd Webber.

How's a Mexican like a cue ball?

The harder you hit it the more English it picks up!

Bus Driver Jokes More Bus Driver Jokes

What do you call a bus driver who helps old people and parents with children on and off the bus?

A stand up driver.

What does a dyslexic tiger and a bus driver have in common?

A bus driver can't change his stops.

Rule Jokes More Rule Jokes

What did the sign say?

Grandkids: No children in shopping cart :(( Me: Rules are rules.

Why does pokemon have only one save file per game?

I mean think about it, One for Charmander One for Squirtle and one for your second charmander. (found that but it's against rules to post links lol so I'll just leave that here for a good laugh)

Tectonic Plate Jokes More Tectonic Plate Jokes

What does one tectonics plate say to another after an earthquake?

It's not your fault.

What did the tectonic plate say to the other tectonic plate when he bumped into the him?

Sorry, my fault.