Tomato Jokes

What happens when you run away from tomatos?

They ketchup.

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What do you get when you put a tomato in your mothers shoe?

A spanking

What is like tomato but better?

DD-WRT

What's red, round and goes up and down, up and down?

A tomato in an elevator

What's red and goes up and down?

A tomato in an elevator.

What did the Bacon say to the Tomato?

What did Bacon say to Tomato? "Lettuce get together"

What did the tomato say to the cheese in court?

I rest my queso.

Why did the tomato turn red?

Because it saw the salad dressing

What did the tomato say to the peach?

Nice pits."

What did the tomato say to the mushroom?

You're a fun guy"

What did the doctor say When a fruit walked into his office that was feeling like a vegetable?

what's tomato with you !

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How can you tell a dog from a tomato?

The tomato is red.

What's small red and goes up and down?

A tomato in an elevator.

What's red and moves up and down?

A tomato in an elevator :)

Why did the dog go to the doctor after a tomato fell on his head?

The tomato was in a can.

What did one tomato say to the other?

A: Catch up.

Why did the tomato turned red?

Because it saw the salad dressing

What does a tomato and a potato have in common?

Both are red,except from the potato.

What did Bacon say to Tomato?

Lettuce get together!

What did the tomato say to the ear of corn?

Nothing, as tomatoes lack any ability to communicate.

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What do you call an arrogant prisoner walking down the stairs?

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By the ears...

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What is Lil Wayne's favorite food?

Caesar salad

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What's green, slimy, and smells like bacon?

Kermit The Frog's fingers.

What's long, green, and smells like bacon?

Kermit's finger

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What is the difference between a banjo and a trampoline?

You don't have to take your shoes off to jump on a banjo.

What's the difference between an introverted physicist and an extroverted physicist?

An extroverted physicist looks at shoes when they're talking to you.

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What do you mean, 10?

10 what Months Weeks !" Doctor: "Nine."

What did the gentleman say to the doctor when he went to get his pus drained?

Please! I in cyst!

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Why don't you take a train?

Monster: I did once but my mother made me give it back.

What kind of dance does your mother do?

The MOMbo.