Carrot Jokes

What did one Snowman say to the other Snowman?

Can you smell carrot?

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What is orange and sounds like a parrot?

A carrot. :

What did the rabbit say to the carrot?

It's been nice gnawing you.

What is worse than a carrot that smells like a snow women?

One that smells like a snow man.

What's invisible and smells like carrots?

bunny farts

Why the rabbits love Selena Gomez?

im farting carrots, im farting carrots...

What key opens a banana?

A monkey. What key opens a carrot? A donkey.

What kinds of vegetables did Ghandi prefer?

Peace and carrots... Thought this up at work today. I'm sure it's been done before but it made me chuckle...

What's the difference between a rabbit on a treadmill and a rabbit with a carrot stuck up its nose?

One is a fit bunny and the other is a bit funny

What is invisible and smells like carrots?

Rabbit farts

How do you make a ginger snap?

Call them "carrot top"

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What did the carrot say to the DJ?

Lettuce Turnip The Beet

Why'd you get me carrots and lettuce?

Wait but that means-" *Hamster at home wearing glorious diamond earrings*

Why u bean like this?

SMACK "Don't u carrot all " CRACK

What did the carrot say when the last vegetable arrived at the party?

TURNIP

What do you call an elephant with a carrot in each ear ?

Anything you want as he can't hear you !

What do you get if you cross a cat with a parrot ?

A carrot !

How do you lead a horse to water?

With carrots

What happened when the carrot died?

There was a huge turnip at the funeral.

What did the guy who didn't like vegetables say?

I don't really carrot all for vegetables."

What do you call a stegosaurus with carrots in its ears?

Anything you want to - it can't here you!

What did celery say when he broke up with his girlfriend?

She wasn't right for me, so I really don't carrot all.

What did one snowman say to the other snow man?

Do you smell carrot?

What's orange and sounds like a parrot?

A Carrot.

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Peace Jokes More Peace Jokes

What is the difference between Donald and a peace of sh..?

NOTHING....!!!

What were the martyr's last words?

I believe in peace in our time

Ghandi Jokes More Ghandi Jokes

What kinds of vegetables did Ghandi prefer?

Peace and carrots... Thought this up at work today. I'm sure it's been done before but it made me chuckle...

What did Ghandi say when he was in the toilet?

I'm having a movement"

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

Why I love duct tape?

It can turn "No, no no!" into "mmph, mmmph, mmmph"

What did the bishop say to the priest?

It's my turn.

Prefer Jokes More Prefer Jokes

What music do cats prefer?

Deadmau5

What shampoo do dragons prefer?

Head & Smolders

Gnaw Jokes More Gnaw Jokes

What does Dracula say to his victims?

It's been nice gnawing you.

What artistic dog chews a lot and follows the rules of the farm where it lives?

A Chihuahua that can draw and gnaw while obeying the law and lying on straw!

Key Jokes More Key Jokes

What's the key to a good joke?

Timing.

Why can't blondes finish software updates?

They can never find the "any" key.

Nose Jokes More Nose Jokes

How did Michael Jackson pick his nose?

From a catalogue. ba dum tss

Who won the animal race?

The giraffe and the aardvark were running neck and neck but the aardvark won by a nose!

Rabbit Jokes More Rabbit Jokes

What's the fastest way to send a rabbit?

Haremail.

Why are rabbits like calculators?

They both multiply a lot.