Stare Jokes

Why was the blond staring at a carton of orange juice?

Because it said concentrate.

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What do you call a hen staring at lettuce?

Chicken sees-a salad

What do you call a hen staring at a lettuce?

A chicken Caesar salad.

What do you call a lemon staring at an elderly lady?

Citric Flaccid

What do you call a chicken staring at lettuce?

Chicken sees a salad

How do you know if an introvert likes you when you're talking to them?

They'll stare at your shoes instead of theirs.

What do you call a chicken staring at a head of lettuce?

Chicken sees-a salad

Why do men stare at a woman's breasts?

To prove they can focus on two things at once.

What's the difference between an introverted scientist and an extroverted scientist?

An extroverted scientist will stare at YOUR feet.

How can you tell if a Finnish guy likes you?

He's staring at your shoes instead of his own.

How do you know an engineer is an extrovert?

He stares at shoes while he talks to you.

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Why can't people in wheelchairs be looked at for too long?

The can't handle stares.

How do you pick out the extroverted engineer?

He's the one staring at YOUR feet when he talks

How much wood can Chuck Norris if Chuck Norris could chuck wood?

Chuck Norris would just stare at the wood, and it would chuck itself out of fear.

How does a flight of steps check out a woman?

It stares.

What's the longest you've ever stared at your phone without glancing up to look at the road while driving?

For me it's three weeks.

What's the difference between a daydreamer and a pervert?

A daydreamer stares out of windows.

What is the hardest thing about staring at a pile of dead babies?

Possible NSFW) My erection.

This joke may have profanity.

What does Ellen Pao have in common with the girl's mom from 'The Sixth Sense'?

The both have no idea why everyone stopped talking and just stared at her.

Where does the thumb meet its type?

At the SPACE BAR! reddit is fun! I'm staring at the keyboard tryin' to think up a joke and voila'!

What's next, thought crimes?

CNN: If you stare at your hand for a long time it will look weird

How do you make someone stare at a screen for 30 seconds?

Please wait...

What do college students and deer have in common?

A: They both stand in the middle of the road and stare at your headlights.

What do you call a chicken staring intently at a piece of lettuce?

A chicken ceaser salad.

What is something that basically stops when you stare at it, but flys by when you dont?

There are two answere: Time and Boo (from Mario games). Just made this joke up what do you guys think

What do you do if the Ocean stares at you?

Sea it and Wave :3

What do mathematicians get if they stare at the roots of negative numbers for too long?

Square eyes

How can you tell you are dealing with an extroverted engineer?

He's staring at somebody else's shoes.

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Prove Jokes More Prove Jokes

How do you expect us to loan you money if you can't prove to us that you don't need it?

Banks

Why do men stare at a woman's breasts?

To prove they can focus on two things at once.

Carton Jokes More Carton Jokes

Why was the blond staring at a carton of orange juice?

Because it said concentrate.

Why did the blonde keep a empty carton of milk in the fridge?

A: In case she wanted black coffee.

Prepare Jokes More Prepare Jokes

When you ask me a question, would you prefer the blank stare or the eye roll as a response?

I like to be prepared.

Why people cry during the weddings?

they are preparing for whats coming afterwards

Idiot Jokes More Idiot Jokes

Who is that Idiot..?

If Boy is in love - His parent Ask: Idiot, Who is that Girl.. Moral :: No matter who ever is in love... Boys Are Always Idiot :P (LOL)

Why does Batman wear a mask?

Because the citizens of Gotham aren't morons, like those idiots over in Metropolis

Ford Jokes More Ford Jokes

Why were there 5 Mexicans in a Ford?

It was a Fiesta

What's your favorite pickup line?

Mine is the Ford F Series.

Orange Juice Box Jokes More Orange Juice Box Jokes

What do you get when you rub two orange juice boxes together?

Pulp friction.

Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice box?

Because it says "concentrate"

Foot Jokes More Foot Jokes

What did Plaxico Burress say when he read Colin Kaepernick's Tweets?

Man, this guy just keeps shooting himself in the foot".

What's a foot long, is as hard as wood, and is slippery?

A wooden slipper

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between God and fighter pilots?

A: God doesn't think he's a fighter pilot.

What's the difference between a goldfish and a mountain goat?

Goldfish like to muck around the fountain.