Bake Jokes

Whats baked every day and sells itself?

My sister.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What do you call it when you spill meth into your cake mix?

Baking Bad

What is the driest soda you can buy?

Baking soda.

Why couldn't the potato get off the couch?

Because it was baked.

What does the KKK use to bake cookies?

White flour!

What is the difference between a baker baking a cake and a gynecologist giving an exam?

A few degrees.

What do you ask a Jamaican who's baking a cake?

Hey, are you Jamaican a cake?

What's the best way to prepare baby food?

Shake'n bake.

What is it called when Michael J. Fox smokes a joint?

Shake N' Bake.

Why do baked bean cans contain only 239 beans?

Because if they had one more, they would be 240.

Why do chefs put so much effort into baking cakes?

Because you only get out what you pudding.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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Coffee Mug

What do you call someone who gets stoned and baked?

A witch.

What do you call a dance party in Colorado?

Shake 'n Bake.

What does Beyonce bake her cookies on?

Aluminatti foil

What's a joke that you invented?

Here's mine: Did you hear about the guy who had to snort a line of baking soda every day? He was basically addicted.

What happened to Mr. Potato Head when he smoked weed?

He got baked.

Why does the baker bake?

Because he kneads the dough.

What did the Catholic baker say after baking the Easter Eucharist?

He is risen.

How can you tell if a potato is baked?

It's are all red and glossy.

Why did the cardiologist bake a cake with partially hydrogenated oil?

Because he took the hypocritic oath

What is pickle bread before its baked?

Dill dough

How about baked chocolate cake?

Nah" "Yummy choccy bake " "No" Guy who named the orange: I have an idea...

How hot was that oven?

That they baked you in Because you're hotter than a freshly baked Pizza!

Why are you baking octopus?

So I can get octopi.

Why did the cookie get fired from his job?

He came to work baked.

Why are goldfish crackers always smiling?

Because they're baked..

How many Blondes does it take to bake chocolate chip cookies?

10....one to bake the cookies, and 9 to peel the M&Ms

What form of radiation bakes you cookies?

A gramma ray

What kind of Pop do you cook with?

Baking Soda

What did you do on the weekend?

ME: I baked CW: Nice. What did you bake ME: Me

Why did the cookie smoke weed?

Because he wanted to get baked.

Why did the baker bake more bread?

A: He kneaded the dough.

What do you call a loaf baked in a zoo?

Bread in captivity.

What's a Brit's favorite baked good?

cake.

What do you call bread baked in the south?

inbred

What do you get if you bake weed into apple pastry?

A high turnover.

What is Chalah before it's baked?

Judo

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Peel Jokes More Peel Jokes

What did the one banana say to the other banana who had his feelings hurt?

I know that peel.

Why don't blondes like M&ampMs?

They're so damned hard to peel.

Blonde Jokes More Blonde Jokes

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb?

They don't change it, they just take forever to find where to fit the batteries

Why can't a Blonde make Kool-Aid?

She can't fit the two cups of water into the tiny packet.

Car Jokes More Car Jokes

What do you call a bee that has been run over by a car?

Bee flat Music joke for those who don't understand. B flat is a note.

What has two legs and bleeds?

Half of your dog...I hit it with my car.

Fire Jokes More Fire Jokes

What happens when a controlled fire goes out of control?

Someone gets fired.

Why did Helen Keller fire her maid?

Cuz she left the plunger in the toilet. - Jackie Martling

Syndrome Jokes More Syndrome Jokes

What did the retarded kids call there rock band?

Syndrome of a Down...

What do you call a lion with Down's syndrome?

A leotard.

Sell Jokes More Sell Jokes

Which phone is most sold in Australia?

The htc M8. Oi mate

How do you hit those high notes?

Adam Levine: I sold my soul to the devil. Interviewer: Excuse me Adam Levine: Practice.

9 Jokes More 9 Jokes

What does a 9 volt battery, and a pretty girls bumhole have in common?

People tell you not to, but you're still going to put your tongue on it.

Why did they skip 9?

Because, 7 8 9...

Friend Jokes More Friend Jokes

Why was the candle mad at his friend?

He blew him off.

Who is the most popular guy at a nudist colony?

The one who can bring his friends two cups of coffee and a dozen donuts.