Mourn Jokes

What do you call an erection during a funeral?

Mourning wood!

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
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What time of day is it in France right now?

Mourning

What do you call a fart in the middle of the night? What do you call a fart in the mourning?

A midnight snack A hot Breakfast

What do you call a sad tree?

Mourning wood

Why do happy people like to sleep in late?

Because they aren't mourning people. I just made this up!! Could you all help me with the wording? It feels like it could be a little better I just don't know how to word it differently while using the same "mourning" pun as the punch line.

What do you call a tree that lost its family in a forrest fire?

Mourning wood

What do necrophiliacs get at funerals?

Mourning wood.

When should funerals occur?

Mourning

What do you call a sad Ent?

Mourning wood.

What kind of an erection does a necrophiliac get?

Mourning wood! :)

What do you call a 2x4 that lost its family to a fire?

mourning wood

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug
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What did the necrophiliac have when his grandmother died?

Mourning wood

What did the necrophiliac get after his wife died?

Mourning wood.

How do you spot a necrophiliac at a funeral?

Mourning wood.

What happens when a necrophiliac goes to a funeral?

He gets mourning wood.

How do you know if you're a necrophiliac?

You get mourning wood.

How do you know if you are a necrophiliac?

You get mourning wood

What's another name for a casket?

Mourning wood.

What's worse than morning wood?

Mourning wood

What time of day is the saddest?

The mourning

How do you greet people at a funeral?

Mourning, everybody!

What does a widow say when she wakes up?

Mourning

What does a necrophiliac get at a funeral?

Mourning wood.

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What did the angry man sing when he found his slippers chewed up by the new puppy ?

I must throw that doggie out the window !"!

What do elephants sing at christmas ?

Noel-ephants Noel-ephants...

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How do you describe every gf in one word?

K

What's the magic word?

Cut to them back at the station writing on a chalkboard with dozens of words crossed off

Fart Jokes More Fart Jokes

What do you call a person who helps teach others to fart?

A tooter. (thanks, honey)

What happened to the guy who farted in church?

He sat in his own pew.

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What does Johnny Depp yell when a tree falls in the forest?

Timbuuuuuurrrrrrrrton!

How do you tell the difference between a Syrian hospital and an ISIS military base?

I don't know either, Johnny, just fly the drone.

Happy People Jokes More Happy People Jokes

Why do happy people like to sleep in late?

Because they aren't mourning people. I just made this up!! Could you all help me with the wording? It feels like it could be a little better I just don't know how to word it differently while using the same "mourning" pun as the punch line.

Where do the happy people of Baltimore live?

In a merry land.

Person Jokes More Person Jokes

What will you call a person who sleeps next to a close relative?

A) NapKin

What's the difference between a pot head and a person who physically abuses children?

One is good at rolling blunts, the other is good at bowling runts.

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

What did the dubstep valentine's day card say?

I wub you

Which day is the most agreeable?

Yesterday

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

How do you turn an airliner into a boat?

Allahu Ackbar!**

What do cubs fans do after they win the world series?

They turn off their Xbox.