Baseball Jokes

With the NHL season getting started tonight. I am wondering what are you best jokes making fun off sports teams. All Sports (Baseball,hockey,football, soccer etc).

What happened to the baseball played who was unfaithful to his wife?

He was thrown out at home. - His two balls got a strike.

How are a full count in baseball and a mutated 2 time convict the same?

They both have 3 balls and 2 strikes.

What do Cooperstown and Woodstock have in common?

Cooperstown is where Baseball wasn't invented and Woodstock is where the festival didn't happen.

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Why don't they allow lesbians to play baseball?

When they get to third base they think they've scored

What is CC Sabathia's favorite inning to pitch in baseball?

The bottom of the fifth

Why cant bulimics be pitchers in baseball?

Because they always throw up

Why don't matches play baseball?

A: One strike, and they're out.

What animal is best at hitting a baseball?

A bat!

What do you get when you cross a baseball with a turkey?

A fowl ball!

Why don't orphans play baseball?

They have no home to run to

Why are orphans terrible at baseball?

They've never known what home is.

Why did the farmer call his horse Baseball?

Because it's covered with horsehide!

Why are orphans unable to play baseball?

They've never known what home is.

What kind of baseball do burgers play?

Ketchup baseball!

Which cheeseburger makes a big hit in baseball?

A double!

What Do You Call Adrian Peterson Playing Baseball?

A switch hitter.

Who's bad at baseball but fun at parties?

A pitcher filled with margaritas!

Why is there a baseball bat under your bed?

Me: In case there's a burglar. 5: Me: 5: Why do burglars like to play baseball

What's the difference between a firstborn prince and a baseball?

A baseball is thrown to the air.

What do you call a crab that plays baseball?

A pinch hitter.

Why can't an orphan play baseball?

Because he can't run home

What do a baseball and a Mexican have in common?

The harder you hit it the more English you get

Why couldn't The Doctor play baseball?

They couldn't figure out Who was on first (Sorry, if this has been submitted before, im new here)

What is Batman's favorite sport?

Baseball.

What do you get when you combine Soccer and Baseball?

Golbat.

What do you call a kid with no arms and legs playing baseball?

2nd base.

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Abel Jokes More Abel Jokes

Who's there ! Abel ! Abel who ?

Abel to see you ha ha!

Where is the first baseball game in the Bible?

In the big inning. Eve stole first, Adam stole second. Cain struck out Abel. The Giants and the Angels were rained out.

Golf Jokes More Golf Jokes

Why is golf named "golf"?

Because all the other fore letter words were taken (Thanks to ... this now makes sense...)

What's the best part about golf?

It's the only activity where you actually aim for the hole under 18 and you don't go to jail.

Ketchup Jokes More Ketchup Jokes

Why did the mayonnaise win the running race?

Because the tomato sauce couldn't Ketchup.

What is the question most frequently asked by a philosopher?

Would you like ketchup with your chips

Case Jokes More Case Jokes

Why did... Why did the golfer wear an extra pair of pants?

In case he got a hole in one! Ha Ha Ha Ha

Why should all teenagers get a case for their cell phones?

Because they should use protection to practice safe text

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between a Siberian husky and an Alaskan husky?

About 1500 miles.

What's the difference between an incontinent person and a 1980's Renault?

One's a leaker, one's a Le Car.

Angel Jokes More Angel Jokes

Where'd he go?

and the angel said, "He's at IHOP for never-ending pancakes" and they were like, "Word."

Whoa- is that Elvis?

Angel- no, it's an impersonator M: Wow, is that... A: listen man all we got is impersonators

Catch Jokes More Catch Jokes

What do Pokemon Go and Tinder have in common?

Both give you a good chance of catching something

What do Bill Cosby and the Little Dutch Boy have in common?

Both were caught with their finger in the dyke.

Motivational Speaker Jokes More Motivational Speaker Jokes

What's the difference between a motivational speaker and a baseball player?

The baseball player has all of its limbs.

What did the motivational speaker say to the duct?

You conduit!