Cloud Jokes

What do you call people that you hate?

Clouds, because once they are gone it's a beautiful day.

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How can you tell if it is a Salvador Dali painting?

One of the clouds in the background is blowing another one.

What's the difference between Mic Jagger and a Scotsman?

Mic Jagger says "Hey you, get off of my cloud". A Scotsman says "Hey, McLeod! Get off of my ewe!"

Why was Cloud trying to cheer up Sky?

He looked a little blue

Why did the drunk guy call the sheep Legolas?

Because it was a cloud

What did the CN tower say to the clouds???

Only the tip baby, I promise!

Why do clouds make good Kings?

Because they have rain over every country in the world.

What's the difference between a Scottish guy and Mick Jagger?

One says "Hey, you, get off of my cloud!" The other says "Hey McCloud, get off of my ewe!"

What do you call a sheep with no legs ?

A cloud.

What's the difference between the Rolling Stones and Scotsman?

The Rolling Stones say "Hey, you, get off of my cloud." A Scotsman says "Hey, McCloud, get off of my ewe."

What's the difference between the Rolling Stones and a Scottish shepard?

The Stones say "hey you get off of my cloud!" The Shepard says "hey Mc Cloud get of of my ewe!"

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What do the woman from southern California and the clouds over the Pacific coast have in commen?

They're both Marine layers

What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottish shepherd?

One says, "Hey, you, get off of my cloud!" The other says, "Hey, MacLeod, get off of my ewe!

What do a Caucasian woman's breasts have in common with clouds?

They're both white fluffy things that float high above the fruitful land where the seeds are planted.

This joke may have profanity.

What do clouds wear under their pants?

Thunderwear!

What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottish Highlander?

Mick Jagger sings, "Hey you, get off of my cloud . . ", while the Scottish Highlander yells, "Hey McCloud, get off of my ewe!"

What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottish farmer?

Mick Jagger says "Hey (hey) you (you) get off of my cloud..." the Scottish farmer says "Hey McCloud get off of my ewe"

What do Bill Gates and the Pope have in common?

They've both put their faith in the cloud.

What's the difference between the Rolling Stones and a Scottsman?

The Rolling Stones say "Hey! You! Get off of my cloud!" And a Scottsman says "Hey McLeod, get of me ewe!"

Why do Transformers always have their heads in the clouds?

They're robots in da skies.

What's white and drips from the cloud?

The coming of the Lord.

What do clouds wear under their clothes?

A: Thunderware.

What's the difference between the Rolling Stones and a Scottish sheep farmer?

One says, 'Hey! You! Get off of my cloud!' The other says 'Hey! MacLeod! Get off of my ewe.'

What did one cloud of fog say to the other?

I don't know. It's a Mistery.

What do you call a grandpa who couldn't understand why his email wanted to upload his attachment to share it?

An old man yelling at the cloud

What's the difference... ...between Mick Jagger and an angry Scotsman?

One says "Hey, you, get off of my cloud!" The other says "Hey, McLeod, get off of my ewe!"

Why did the cloud get $10M for having a fight?

He was the raining champion.

Where do lightning bolts go on dates?

To cloud 9

Why aren't Japanese optimistic?

Because not every cloud has a silver lining

What's the difference between The Rolling Stones and a Scot?

One says "hey, you, get off of my cloud", and the other says "hey, McLeod, get off of my ewe".

What cloud is so lazy because it will not get up?

Fog

What kind of shorts do clouds wear?

Thunderwear.

What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottsman?

Mick Jagger says "Hey, you, get off of my cloud!" A Scottsman says "Hey, McCloud, get off of my ewe!"

Why are clouds like jockeys?

Because they hold the reins!

What does that cloud look like to you?

3-year-old: A cloud. Me: No, what do you imagine it could be 3-year-old: Rain.

What do clouds wear during a storm?

Thunderwear

What's the difference between a Scotsman and the Rolling Stones?

The Rolling Stones say 'hey you, get off my cloud.' the Scotsman says 'hey MaCleod, get off my ewe.'

What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a scottish sheep herder?

One says, "hey, you! Get off my cloud!", and the other one says, "hey, McCloud! Get off of my ewe!"

What is the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottish farmer?

One says, "Hey, you, get off of my cloud!". The other says "Hey, McCloud, get off of my ewe!".

What's the difference between the Rolling Stones and a Scotsman?

The Rolling Stones sing "Hey You! Get off of my cloud!" A Scotsman shouts "Hey Mcleod!! Get off of my ewe!"

What's white and sticky?

What's white and sticky and hangs from the clouds . The second coming of the Lord

What's the difference between Mick Jagger, and a Scottish farmer?

Mick Jagger says 'Hey, you, get off of my cloud' The Scottish farmer says 'Hey, MacLeod, get off of my ewe'

Why was the Sun mad at all the clouds?

Because they kept throwin shade

What's the difference between a Scotsman and a Rolling Stone?

A: A Rolling Stone says "hey you get off of my cloud!" while a Scotsman says "Hey McLeod get off of my ewe!"

What's the difference between an angel and a Scotsman?

To one you say, "Hey you, get off my cloud!" The other: "Hey McLoed, get off my ewe!"

What do clouds want to be when they grow up?

Thunderstorms

What do you call a sheep with no legs?

A cloud.

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Sky Jokes More Sky Jokes

What does a terrorist tell hes son?

Aim to the sky, maybe you'll shoot a plane.

Why was Cloud trying to cheer up Sky?

He looked a little blue

Sheep Jokes More Sheep Jokes

What are the three biggest lies an Oklahoma State fan tells?

I WON this belt buckle, I OWN that truck, and I swear to God I was just helping that sheep over the fence.

How do sheep sign their e-mails?

Ewes sincerely.

Scottish Jokes More Scottish Jokes

What's the difference between the Rolling Stones and a Scottish sheep farmer?

One says, 'Hey! You! Get off of my cloud!' The other says 'Hey! MacLeod! Get off of my ewe.'

What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottish Highlander?

Mick Jagger sings, "Hey you, get off of my cloud . . ", while the Scottish Highlander yells, "Hey McCloud, get off of my ewe!"

Salvador Dali Jokes More Salvador Dali Jokes

How can you tell if it is a Salvador Dali painting?

One of the clouds in the background is blowing another one.

What does Salvador Dali have for breakfast?

Surreal.

Big Cloud Jokes More Big Cloud Jokes

Why are people who vape always trying to chase after bigger clouds?

More storage space.

What did the little cloud say about the big cloud?

I think you're condensating for something.

Ewe Jokes More Ewe Jokes

What's the difference between The Rolling Stones and a Scot?

One says "hey, you, get off of my cloud", and the other says "hey, McLeod, get off of my ewe".

Why did the ram run off the cliff?

He didn't see the ewe turn.

Stone Jokes More Stone Jokes

Why were all Roman buildings made of stone?

They crucified the carpenter.

How Do You Get Stoned in Ancient Rome?

Start shouting Jehovah.

Watch Jokes More Watch Jokes

What is the saddest Olympic sport to watch?

Water Polio

What's a redneck's last words?

Hey, Watch This!