Force Jokes

What do you call it when old people are forced into slavery?

Indentured servitude.

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What do you call a Bear who is just learning to use the force?

A PANDAwan learner.

What do you call a group of armed nuns enforcing the status quo?

a force of habit

What do you call the act of press-ganging someone into a monastery?

Force of habit.

Why does Luke Skywalker never have trouble getting laid?

Because he always uses the force.

How is Ducktape like the Force?

It has a Dark Side, a Light side and it binds everything the galaxy together. Edit:Duct Tape I know, I was tired

What would you call a terrorist organisation run by wielders of the dark side of the force?

ISITH

What would Steve Urkel say if he used The Force?

Jedi do that?

Why could the crab not find a pair of shoes in his size?

Child labor laws forced all the shoe factories to shut down.

Why couldn't Frodo drop the Ring into Mt. Doom?

Force of Hobbit.

What did the science teacher say when the kid was experimenting with magnets?

May the force be with you"

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What's the best way to force a man to do sit ups?

A. Put the remote control between his toes.

Why do you want to be Jedi?

Imagines using 'the force' to steal everyone's cats and building a cat army To keep the peace

What did Darth Vader say to the Internet?

May the force e-with you.

What do you call the family members of the Force?

Force-kin My friend made this up today while talking about Star Wars.

What type of objects do not accelerate, regardless of the force applied?

Letterhead and envelopes. No matter how hard you try, they remain stationery!

What's the difference between a kid and a drawer?

A drawer won't scream when I force my junk into it.

What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive lawfully?

A: I would be forced to drive unlawfully.

What do clothes and religion have in common?

Someone invented them and forced them on everyone.

What do jedi hate the most?

Forced jokes.

How about some snappy one-liners?

Ironically, the only way you could get me to watch 50 shades of gray is if you tied me up and forced me to watch it.

What do you get when you cross a Jedi with a nun?

a force of habit

Why couldn't the Jedi open the door?

He didn't use enough force...

Why was the doctor forced to leave work early?

The hospital ran all out of patience

What do Jedi say on May 4th?

May the force be with you just like every other day because they have no concept of our Gregorian calendar.

Why is the Force like duct tape?

It has a dark side, a light side, and it holds the universe together.

What did the conductor do when half of the cello section called in sick a week before a major concert?

He was forced to resort to excessive violins.

What do you call an actor from Alabama that is forced by contract to play a certain character in a production?

Role tied.

Why did Stephen get an A on his test?

He held his teacher at gunpoint and forced her to give him a good grade despite the fact he got an F.

What do you call it when someone forces you to watch them take their clothes off?

A power strip.

Why did Darth Vader get suspended from the Police?

He was under investigation for excessive use of Force

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Force Kin Jokes More Force Kin Jokes

Why is Darth Vader's helmet so phallic?

because when they hid Luke & Leia from him, they removed his force kin.

What do you call the family members of the Force?

Force-kin My friend made this up today while talking about Star Wars.

Physicist Jokes More Physicist Jokes

Why is the physicist not worried about his weight?

Because m = AIt

What did the physicist say to the suicidal guy on the bridge?

Don't do it! You have potential!

Monastery Jokes More Monastery Jokes

What did the Gregorian monk say when he was kicked out of the monastery?

Give me one more chants!

Why don't Buddhists vacuum in the corners of the monastery?

Because they have no attachments.

Old People Jokes More Old People Jokes

Why do old people read the bible so much?

I asked my grandad the other day "why do old people read the bible so much?" He replied "cause we're cramming for finals"

How do old people check up to see how their friends are doing?

They look in the obituary

Luke Skywalker Jokes More Luke Skywalker Jokes

What were Luke Skywalker's favourite model cars to play with as a kid?

Toyodas

What did Luke Skywalker say to his sister's bully?

Don't you Leia finger on her

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

What did the daddy salt say to his son?

Stop cracking your NaCles."

Why did the bicycle stop moving?

Because it was two-tiered.

Injection Jokes More Injection Jokes

What do you call the tech. at the vets who has to give injections to cats?

Claude.

What's the newest fitness craze sweeping American police forces?

Lead injections.

Star War Jokes More Star War Jokes

What is it called when two celebrities are fighting?

Star wars.

What did Yoda say when he watched Star Wars on Blu-Ray?

HDMI