Fisherman Jokes

Why did the fisherman head out during a storm?

For the halibut

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What did the fisherman say to the sewage management person?

Would you pull that crap with a net?

Whats does a fisherman and a teen have in common?

They both fiddle with a rod

What did the fisherman and his girlfriend do last night?

Net fish and krill

What did the fisherman do when he really liked a woman?

He invited her over to net fish and krill.

Why are fishermen so good at geometry?

Cause they're good anglers.

Why did the fisherman decide to go fishing?

For the halibut.

What did the fisherman from Boston say to the magician?

Pick a cod, any cod!

What did the fisherman say to the fisherwoman?

Your place or mine

What does a fisherman say when he catches a fish?

His catch-phrase. Short n' Sweet, hope you like it!

Why was the fisherman wealthy and prosperous?

Because he was a master-baiter.

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Why did the fisherman want to go fishing in Alaska?

Just for the halibut.

Why did the Little Mermaid run away with the fisherman?

He had allure.

What did the fisherman say to the card magician?

A: Pick a cod, any cod!

What did the fisherman say to the magician?

Pick a cod, any cod!

How many fishermen does it take to change a light bulb?

One but you should have seen the bulb it must have been THIS big.

What Supreme Court decision applies to fishermen bringing a small boat to shore?

Row v. Wade

Why did the fishermen buy a new pole?

Just for the halibut.

What's the difference between a hunter and a fisherman?

A hunter lies in wait. A fisherman waits and lies.

Why did the fisherman drill a hole in the ice?

For the Halibut

When does a fisherman offend you the most?

When he's completely out of line

Why did the fisherman keep taking off?

Because he was fly fishing.

What did the fisherman say to the street magician?

Pick a cod, any cod!

What do fishermen do at a their conferences?

Network.

What did the fisherman do on his date?

Netfish and krill

What do you call the fisherman that's always handling the pole while fishing?

The Master Baiter.

What do you call a fishermans newborn?

Fresh bait

What is the difference between a fisherman and a lazy student?

One baits his hook the other hates his book.

Why didn't the fisherman go to Florida to fish for long jawed fish with rows of razor like teeth?

He didn't have a Gar

What did the caught fish say to the fisherman in the net?

Well man it's been reel.

What do fishermen say on Halloween?

Trick-or-trout!"

Why did everyone love the fisherman?

He was a real catch

What kind of money do fishermen make ?

Net profits !

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How do you find a British person in a crowd?

1. Shout 0800 00 2. Wait for them to shout 1066.

What's three times worse than OCD?

OCD, OCD, OCD. Wait the last time didn't feel right. OCD, OCD, OCD. Wait, the second time didn't feel right. OCD, OCD, OCD. Wait...

Chinese Jokes More Chinese Jokes

What do you get when you cross a duck and a cat?

A Chinese restaurant's newest entree!

What's a let down Chinese lobster called?

A crushed asian

Pull Jokes More Pull Jokes

How do you tell X chromosomes from Y chromosomes?

You pull down their genes.

Why do cars slow down when they see a cop has pulled someone over?

HE'S A LITTLE BUSY TO WORRY ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW DUMMIES

Live Jokes More Live Jokes

What's the best part of living in Alabama?

You don't live in Mississippi.

What did the Goat living in Manama say when it starting raining?

BAAAHH RAIN!"

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What's the Difference between a Girl and a Woman?

Prison

What's six inches long that women love?

Folding money.

Net Jokes More Net Jokes

Why do blondes occupy about 90% of the net bandwidth?

A: Because they keep accidentally deleting their copies of the blonde joke list.

Who sits at the end of the yellow brick road surfing the Net?

The www.izard of Oz.

Canadian Jokes More Canadian Jokes

What do you call a canadian enchilada?

A centimeter-alada

How do you get three drunk, rowdy Canadians out of a pool?

Ask them to get out of the pool.

Hollywood Jokes More Hollywood Jokes

Why does Kevin Bacon not get more leading roles in Hollywood?

Because it's not kosher. http://36.media.tumblr.com/cb0ad7dd38767e0fc2363665afdb5cdd/tumblrinlinentae7hsEL21tw80r81280.jpg

What's a Chinese fisherman's least favorite part of living in Hollywood?

Pilot season