Salad Jokes

What do you call a chicken looking at lettuce?

Chicken sees a salad.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What is a blonde's favorite vegetable?

Salad

What is Lil Wayne's favorite food?

Caesar salad

Why did the tomato blush?

It saw the salad dressing

What did Octavian say when he stormed Cleopatra's gardens?

Caesar salad

Why was the lettuce scared of the salad?

Cos.

What's the difference between a baby and a salad?

Most people don't get angry when you toss a salad.

Why did the lettuce blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing

What kind of amphibian is in charge of the salad bar?

a salad-manager

Why did the tomato turn red?

Because it saw the salad dressing

What's the worst part of being a cook in prison?

Having to toss everyone's salad

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What did the salad wearing a tuxedo say?

I feel a bit overdressed."

What dressing would you like on your salad?

Me: Ice cream

When a waitress asks me if I want soup or salad, I always ask "who's in charge of tossing the salads here?

Then I frown & order the soup.

What is Shaun Morgan's favorite food?

Seether salad

What do you call a salad that's been cut with a knife?

Ceasar

What does an unfunny person tell a salad?

Teach me senpai!

What did the salad say as it was thrown into jail?

Lettuce Go!"

How do you make a chicken salad?

Make a salad and give it to a chicken.

What kind of lizard goes into salad?

A Salad-Mander! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHILARIOUS

What do you get when you put two different vinaigrettes in your salad?

Cross-dressing

Where's all the microscope oil and acetic acid?

Me: (with a mouthful of salad topped with vinaigrette) I dunno.

Why are so many people obese these days?

Because burgers are$.99 and salads are $4.99

Why did the tomato turned red?

Because it saw the salad dressing

What is a double-wide salad?

It's a salad for people who can't afford a house salad

What do you call a room full of comatose people?

A salad.

Why did the salad cross the road?

To get away from the PETA convention.

What does Popeye use to toss his salad?

Olive Oil.

Why did the cabbage whistle?

Because it saw the salad dressing

What happened when the chef found a daddy long legs in the salad ?

It became a daddy short legs !

What should I wear?

Mr. Salad asks. She replies, "It doesn't matter to me, just be well dressed."

You might also enjoy:

Toss Jokes More Toss Jokes

What's the difference between a baby and a salad?

Most people don't get angry when you toss a salad.

How'd you sleep?

Him: *texts* Horrible...I was tossing and turn- Me: *crawls out from under his bed* I KNOW, YOU POOR THING.

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

What does a pirate call three feet?

A YAAAARRRRGGGG!! Oh look a door.

Why do bears have fur coats ?

Because they'd look stupid in anoraks !

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

How do remove a bunch of drunk Canadians from the pool?

You ask them to leave.

What did the Middle Eastern dishwasher say when his boss asked him what he did all day at work?

Iraq the dishes in the dish rack and Iran the dishwasher

Person Jokes More Person Jokes

What do you call a person who steals and is then praised by his/her friends?

A Redditor.

Whats the point of calling it "secret Santa"?

Everyone knows that the person who gave you the gift is Santa.

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What do women want?

She has been talking nonstop for the last two days.

What did the bunny want to do when he grew up?

Join the Hare Force.

Frown Jokes More Frown Jokes

Why was the Mathematician frowned upon?

He was a chronic math-debater

Where does it stop?

8 Chainz frowned. "14 Chainz doesn't have time for

Caesar Jokes More Caesar Jokes

What is Lil Wayne's favorite food?

Caesar salad

How was Rome split in half?

With a pair of Caesars...

Amphibian Jokes More Amphibian Jokes

What do you call an amphibian in hiding?

Incognitoad.

What kind of amphibian is hired to take your car away?

Toad. Thanks, HammerElectionBeans for the edit.